Most of the associations are created at a subconscious level and are therefore almost impossible to resist since we may not even be aware that the association is happening. There will be times, of course, where that new world is rocked by unforeseen circumstances and events, but you will be able to cope. You'll know what to do to get yourself back on your feet. What else will it involve? In each article, there will be slices of learning followed by exercises where you can test out what you have learned and see how it makes you feel. We don't want you to focus on the exercises when using this article; it's equally important to read the theory, because we want to help you to change your unhelpful thinking, and that means understanding why your thinking should change. You don't have to take a degree in neuroscience, just to have a basic idea of the how and the why. It's when you get the aha' feeling, the moment ofgetting it', that the defences go down and the new ideas and habits begin. Scientists used to believe that the brain was hardwired by the time you became an adult and that, from then on, only a minimal amount of change was possible. We will explain how and why in the section on neuroplasticity. Human beings are not solitary beings and do not often do very well where there is no affection from others. As such, we are constantly looking for approval from our partners on virtually everything we do. When the said approval is not forthcoming, we often feel at a loss as we experience a dip in self-esteem and self-worth. Most people in relationships have either experienced or practiced the silent treatment in a bid to elicit certain relationships from their better halves. This may seem like a rather childish maneuver but you will be surprised at the frequency with which it is used. Even more surprising would be the success rate of this infantile move. Just like most of the other tools of psychological manipulation, the application of the silent treatment can be done in two ways. The first is straightforward as suggested by the title. This is when a partner in a relationship becomes intentionally withdrawn from the other when he or she feels that the other partner has done something wrong.

One telltale sign that you are the recipient of the silent treatment is when a usually talkative partner suddenly has nothing to say whenever he or she is in your company. It is neither magical nor mysterious. The same is true of happiness and wealth. They, too, are no more than the natural consequence of consistently applying the fundamentals of happiness and wealth to life. The key is to stick to the fundamentals. Whether we are working to improve our health, wealth, personal achievement, or professional enterprise, the difference between triumphant success or bitter failure lies in the degree of our commitment to seek out, study, and apply those half-dozen things. For example, for a farmer to reap a plentiful harvest in the fall, the half-dozen basics he must concentrate on are fairly obvious: soil, seed, water, sunshine, nourishment, and care. Each component is of equal importance because only together do they bring to fruition a successful harvest. Whether the enterprise is in the fine arts or in music, mathematics or physics, sports or business, it's those half-dozen fundamentals that count. The understanding and application of this simple principle is the first intelligent step toward accomplishing your dreams and objectives. The second key word to define is wealth. I manage to introduce myself--I kind of choke on my own spit--but if he notices, he doesn't say anything. He just invites me in, and I follow him. My insides are vibrating with fear. But as we pass through the reception area, a woman behind a tall counter smiles and says, Hello. Dr Matthews stops to introduce us. This is my practice partner, Leslie Trevino. Her office is that way--he gestures toward a hallway--and mine is just over here. The place smells faintly of lemon, and even though this home is a therapy office, its homey decor is welcoming. The wood floor creaks as Dr Matthews leads me to his office.

He excuses himself a moment, and while I'm waiting for him, I look at the artwork on the wall. He gained weight and wasn't sleeping well. His nights were restless and his days lacked focus. His productivity dropped. While he once churned out script after script, now he could barely finish a scene. His mood darkened and he stopped getting invites to the best parties. Nobody wanted to be around a sour and irritable person in career freefall. Even worse, his energy level fell. Imperceptible at first, his fatigue gradually worsened until he was unable to maintain his daily work schedule. One evening, while driving home from the studio after another disappointing day, he fell asleep at the wheel and crashed his Porsche into a tree. Thankfully, nobody was hurt. This model is crucial in building self-awareness because it can unearth the reactions we have based on mere association rather than actual reality. Similarly figuring out when other people are reacting based on association alone can help us in understanding their emotions and consequently increase the ability to persuade and influence them. The power of why lies in the ability to make us question our actions, beliefs, and values. When we self-analyze by prodding our inner motivations, we can establish concrete plans and courses of action that will help us in reaching our goals and objectives. The power of why requires us to justify our own actions and this can help in detecting destructive habits and consequently in changing behavior in a positive manner. The power of why is also widely applied in leadership to motivate the masses to action and create a common analogy and sense of purpose. The justification aspect of the why models lead to crystallized reasoning which means we obtain a sense of purpose and direction. The why a model principle is a powerful tool when it is used in business strategy especially in the sales function. By asking the right questions a salesman can establish a need for a product in the client.

Through justification, he can illustrate why the product is necessary and this will go a long way in making his pitch effective. So what we are doing together through this article is rewiring your brain. That is not nearly as scary as it sounds. We will be discovering all the wonderful things that make you you, and letting go of the negative thoughts, emotions and ideas that have somehow clung to you over the years. So often we aren't even aware that it is these that are making us feel anxious or sad and impeding our progress. So, in each article we will be telling you just enough about the what and the why and then you will try it out! People that we work with when we are training tell us that they come to love the science bits. Almost everyone has had moments of being fascinated by the human brain. Up to 60,000 thoughts a day. 3 100,000 chemical reactions every second! And we are living at an incredible time where neuroscience is pushing forward at a rate something like the IT revolution of the last two decades. To be certain that you are the target of this reaction, you will notice that the person's talkative demeanor remains unchanged when he is with friends or other people. A variation of the application of the silent treatment can be viewed as its positive reinforcement variation. This is when a spouse showers their other half with extra attention as a means of validating a particular action of theirs. It is expected that the recipient of the extra attention would want to keep on receiving it and will, therefore, look to continue doing whatever it was that led to it in the first place. Many people may fail to see how such actions may lie in a grey area morally speaking seeing as though both parties involved receive something out of the arrangement. While this may not pose an immediate threat to a relationship, if left unchecked, it is bound to spiral out of control eventually. This is because the fear of receiving the silent treatment coupled with being showered with affection in the case of compliance offers a healthy set of situations for the propagation of the psychological manipulation tactic. In addition to this, the trait is further enhanced by the propagator's desire to have their way and a prolonged history of having the same. This is not a subtle psychological manipulation tactic.

It is precisely for this reason that not many people consider is an influential tactic at all. Wealth is a controversial word because it brings to mind a wide variety of images and sometimes conflicting concepts. After all, each of us views wealth from a different perspective. To one person, wealth may mean having enough money to do whatever he or she wishes. To another, it may mean freedom from debt -- freedom from the constant claim of obligation. To yet another, it may mean the opportunity to grow and to achieve. But out of this diversity comes creativity, and creativity can help each of us find unique ways to work for a life of abundance. To the majority who probably haven't spent too much time thinking about the subject, wealth is simply symbolized by one word: millionaire. Now there's an exciting word! It rings of success, freedom, power, influence, pleasure, possibility, and benevolence. Surely, being a millionaire is not a bad mental image to hold! Three framed cross-stitched pieces read, Little and often make much, Hope is the opposite of fear, and Success is survival. We'll all tuff it out. The floor announces his return, and Dr Matt joins me at the artwork. Ready to get started? I read the words aloud, even though my voice shakes: Hope is the opposite of fear. Dr Matt smiles. One of my patients made that for me. Do--do you think it's true? That--that if a person has hope, they can be--not so afraid?