You may remember a lot from your childhood or not. Some memories may be fuzzier than others. You may feel as if you don't have enough "big" memories. But if they were significant somehow, please include them. Nothing should be discounted. Remember, you're using a lens of compassion. Remember that monsters and ghosts work in the dark. This work that you're doing is designed to help you flip the switch and turn on the floodlights. So have the guts to get all of your defining moments out there, on the page. Refusing to do so, putting your head in the sand rather than confronting those moments, means that you are cheating yourself and your loved ones. If you have done an honest and thorough job of these exercises, you have defined some very important times of focus. You have identified moments that have been extremely important to your experience of life and to the development of your self-concept. These are the building blocks upon which all of your perceptions about life stand. Now is the time to link up your defining moments and see what emerges as the foundation of who you have become. Rather than saying or believing that there's never enough time, try to correct yourself by thinking and saying, There is always more than enough time for the things I want and need to do.' Celebrate time, and make each moment count. <a href=''>Indeed,</a> time can pass us by when we are distracted and mentally absent in our present moments. <a href=''>Simply</a> returning ourselves to where we are, right here, right now, is a way of expanding, honouring and enjoying time. <a href=''>Let</a> time become something luxurious and abundant in your life. <a href=''>Begin</a> with your thoughts, turn your thoughts into speech, and follow your words with affirmative actions. <a href=''>Proactively</a> transform your relationship with time, and find your sparkle deeply nourished. <br /><br /><a href=''>Incorporating</a> strength training into your routine will help you increase your lean muscle mass, a change that will benefit you in many ways. <a href=''>Muscle</a> tissue requires more calories to maintain than fat. <a href=''>Therefore,</a> with increased muscle mass, your body will burn a greater number of calories as part of its daily upkeep--even when you're sleeping or sitting around doing nothing. <a href=''>Another</a> benefit of increasing muscle is that it helps prevent the natural loss of muscle tissue that occurs naturally with aging. <a href=''>Strength</a> training also reinforces the skeleton, helping to stem bone loss and reducing your risk for osteoporosis. <a href=''>Last</a> but not least, strength training gives your muscles the ability to perform quickly and efficiently. <a href=''>There</a> are hundreds of different strength-training exercises, but don't let the abundance of options confuse you. <a href=''>If</a> you're really interested in strength training, I encourage you to learn more about the various exercises. <a href='http://searchfest.mywebcommunity/Minify-CSS-and-JS-1518319801.html'>However,</a> there are eight simple moves (I call them the basic eight) that provide a great fundamental workout. <a href='http://searchfest.mywebcommunity/Think-of-ways-to-stand-out-from-the-crowd-1518319861.html'>Whether</a> you've never lifted weights before or are an experienced exerciser who has never found the right strength-training regimen, you'll find the basic eight straightforward and not at all intimidating. <a href='http://searchfest.mywebcommunity/Use-your-location-in-metatags-1518319921.html'>There's</a> something important to discuss before we head forward, and that's the difference between blame and acknowledgment. <a href=''>There</a> are plenty of people who believe that therapy involves blaming your parents or your past for who you are now. <a href=''>There</a> could be nothing farther from reality. <a href=''>In</a> fact, anyone stuck in blame will only become bitter. <a href=''>That's</a> not helpful at all. <a href=''>This</a> step isn't about blame, it's about acknowledgment. <a href=''>Acknowledgment</a> is recognition. <a href=''>It's</a> owning that something existed or exists. <a href=''>Your</a> search for healing is all about acknowledgment and the power it brings. <a href=''>Please</a> try to catch yourself if you get lost in the idea that you're blaming. <br /><br /><a href=''>I</a> promise you--if you follow these steps, you're not. <a href=''>We</a> absorb messages about ourselves from the experiences we have. <a href=''>This</a> step involves acknowledging what those messages were. <a href=''>The</a> experiences on your timeline carried a message to you, whether intentional or unintentional, positive or painful. <a href=''>For</a> example, if the event is that your best friend died in a car accident, the (unintentional) message you'd learn might be, "People I care about can suddenly disappear from my life," or "If I love, I can get hurt." How has that defining moment affected you, long term? <a href=''>What</a> you're looking for here are aspects about yourself--qualities or lack of qualities--that have developed as a direct consequence of that event. <a href=''>Your</a> paragraph might begin, "As a result of this defining moment, I believe that I have lived my life with the tendency to be X, or with an approach to living that is governed by a self-concept that includes Y." My own paragraph, for example, might start out like this: "As a result of my experience in fifth grade, I became somewhat cynical, but also very self-reliant. <a href=''>I</a> don't have a blind trust of authority. <a href=''>I</a> firmly believe that if I don't stand up for myself, it is very possible that no one will. <a href=''>I</a> recognize that I cannot expect anyone tocarry me' through life," and so on. Put some precise language around the parts of yourself you acquired as long-term consequences of the incident. How has it defined you? Take some time now to check your characterization of your defining moment. Were you really the victim you believed you were? Was the victory, or the loss, or the outcome properly characterized by you, to you? If you've been BS-ing yourself about this defining moment, now is the time to acknowledge that--in writing. Your life demands choices. Day in and day out, someone or something is expecting you to make some decision. Choosing is a fact of life that you cannot escape: what do you want; where do you want to go; are you going to buy this car or that one; should you just live together or take the plunge and get married; should you tell your mother what Uncle Bill did to you when he visited last Christmas; should you try drugs or just say no; should you believe what the kids are saying about what happened; is it time to put Mother in the home; do you take this job or figure a way to stay home with the kids; should you believe in God? Choices, choices, choices and no way to avoid them.

If you're honest, you know there have been times when you have stepped right up and made certain choices with conviction and clarity. At other times you "chickened out" and hoped somebody else would just make the decision for you, simply because you didn't have the guts or the energy to face the pressure. What you may not have realized is that even in "not choosing," you were in fact making a choice. No matter how fast you run, no matter how much you try to hide, you cannot not choose. In living joyous and mindful lives we are called to see God, or The Universe, in all things. In the Japanese Shinto religion, Kami are seen as gods that dwell in all things, even inanimate objects such as vases or life forms such as fruit and vegetables. In this way, all things we touch need to be treated as special and sacred. The gratitude and care we give to our personal belongings, our home environments, the ingredients with which we cook and indeed anything in our lives that we touch with our minds, hearts and hands is a joyous and profound way of showing our respect for the magic in all things. We are often brusque, careless and forgetful with our possessions, even to the point of accruing clutter that complicates and burdens our lives. Yet when we touch things we love, it naturally follows that we need less things in our lives to be happy. What we do have simply matters more. Acknowledgement, love and appreciation for all things, big and small, changes our lives. In the words of Socrates, the secret to happiness is not found in seeking more, but in developing the capacity to enjoy less. It takes surprisingly little time to do these exercises: just about twenty minutes. All you need are a few dumbbells; or, if you have access to weight machines at the gym, all these moves (except for squats) have a machine alternative. Choose the size of your dumbbells (or adjustment on the weight machines) according to how many repetitions you can do. The weights must be heavy enough to fatigue your muscles after eight to ten reps. Begin with one or two sets per exercise, eight to ten repetitions per set three times a week. (Take no more than 15 to 30 seconds between sets.) You may find that you can't finish the eight reps in the second set, but that's okay; it's evidence that you're working hard enough in the first set. As your strength improves, you'll eventually be able to complete both sets.

After about four weeks, reassess. If you're making all your sets easily, add another set. Also check your weights. Are they heavy enough? If not, move up to the next dumbbell weight or adjust the weight machines. Keep reassessing every four to six weeks, and when you're ready for a new challenge, add another day. Your ultimate goal: three sets of each exercise doing eight to ten reps every other day. What did I absorb and come to believe about my capability of being loved, safe, and valued from this experience? If I morph myself into what others need me to be, then I'll be loved. There's no right or wrong in what you decide the messages were. The messages will be unique to you--but also are part of our shared human experience. We all have absorbed messages like these, whether intentionally sent or not. If you struggle, talk to your buddy about it, ask a trusted friend, or consider sessions with a therapist. You can hear the power of these messages. They led you to the survival strategies you developed to hide the pain. You want to acknowledge that power. Why? Because these messages can shape your life for the good, or they can lead you in directions that are self-destructive and harmful, such as perfectly hidden depression. Like everyone else in the real world, some of your choices have worked out really well, and some of them have proven to be total train wrecks. Unfortunately, all of your choices, good and bad, have the power to be hugely significant in your life.