Date Tags ideas

Are they treating me in a positive, kind, and well-intentioned way, or are they trying to be hurtful to me? Adding self-nurturing practices into your life can go a long way to help you connect with yourself. These practices can teach you what is good, pleasurable, and healing for your mind, body, heart, and soul. This isn't an overnight success story but a journey that will span your lifetime. We're constantly evolving and transforming. Children grow to honor themselves as they watch you set an example of what that means. If you are presented with a career opportunity that your mate does not welcome, discuss it. Why does the resistance exist? Do you see a gain where your mate sees a loss? People resist change when change is believed to create a loss of love. When benefits are anticipated, change becomes easy. Children only suffer in the presence of tension, blame, and uncertainty. On the other hand, if you and your mate are talking through your issues and respecting each other's opinions, your children get a good look at reciprocal tolerance. Both partners need to be free to accelerate their educations and consider new opportunities without permission from the other. If you block your spouse's progress because of insecurity, you block the security you seek. But in general, old friendships indicate loyalty. Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck has spent decades studying what she calls fixed and growth mindsets. People with a growth mindset believe that they can improve their intelligence and skills. They love to learn. They're motivated by challenges and see failure as a sign that they need to stretch their abilities.

They're resilient and comfortable taking risks. Someone with a fixed mindset believes the opposite: that talent and intelligence are assigned at birth and taking a risk only presents an opportunity to embarrass yourself. You want to align yourself with someone who has a growth mindset because when problems arise, which they inevitably will, you'll want a partner who will rise to the occasion, not throw up their hands in defeat. A person with a growth mindset is much more likely to buckle down and work on improving things rather than give up on the relationship and assume things can't be fixed. Key tip for your dating search The more you go inward and become curious about observing your experience, the easier it becomes to find your limits. For instance, if you're snapping at your kids and have a short fuse with your spouse, then that's usually a sign something is off. You're the only one who can figure out the why. It could be that you're pulled in too many directions and you need to find at least 30 minutes a day just for you. Maybe the answer comes through meditating or journaling or from having an open conversation with your spouse about how you're feeling, or maybe you call a close friend or a therapist who could talk it out with you and help you process. How you get to the answer and what it is could be anything. The key is that you're aware something is off, that it needs addressing, and that you're the one who takes responsibility to find what you need, set the boundary, and stand behind it. As you discover who you are, you begin valuing yourself, which makes it impossible to stay quiet. You have to voice what you need. You have to put a boundary in place. Of course, you want to feel important to your mate. Of course, you want to be respected for your contribution. Of course, you want your opinion to count. You also want to be free to pursue a future you believe in. But whatever restrictions you put upon the other, you put upon yourself.

If you stand in the way of another's progress, you close the door to your own progress. Your gift of tolerance is the example your children need as they try to create harmony for themselves. You can't tend others successfully until you know how to tend yourself successfully. While you are here on Earth, you have things to learn, wisdom to embrace, and people to love. Everything you experience is the opportunity through which that growth is possible. You can spot people with a growth mindset by paying attention to how they handle themselves in different situations. HOW TO SPOT A GROWTH MINDSET Situation How they approach challenges Embrace them How they respond to setbacks How they view learning new skills As a chance to embarrass themselves As a chance to grow How they respond to someone else's accomplishments Feel threatened The more you do this, the easier it becomes. Think of it as a muscle that needs strengthening. The more you practice, the stronger it becomes. Sometimes it's hard to know what's important. When we go inward, what are we looking for?

Hunt for your values, which will tell you so much about who you are, who you want to be, and what and who you want in your life. Values are the deeply held beliefs that are the core of who we are, how we see the world, and how we want to experience it. Respect, honesty, trust, fairness, listening, cooperation, kindness, compassion, openness, love--we all have values. We're just not always conscious of them. When we aren't, it's easy for our boundaries to get eroded. Step-children have the challenge of living in one family for a while--with one set of rules--only to be thrown into a new family, with a different set of rules. The premise then becomes how to participate constructively as the new unit tries to live in harmony. Sparks often fly as the newly created whole tries to find comfort within itself. Step-parenting is a microcosm of the world's struggle to love. Just as families go through upheavals to negotiate agreements, so do towns, countries, and continents. All must sift through useless flailing to find constructive coping. When major snags develop, it's usually because one or more sectors of the newly formed whole refuse to adapt and assimilate. But regardless of how many problems arise, resolution is possible. You must take the position that when one part of the whole refuses to cooperate with the rest of the whole, the preservation of the unit must be honored. To preserve the unit, the agitators must face the only logical choice: either love or leave. Feel inspired How they speak to themselves With condemnation from a loud inner critic With self-compassion In the end, a relationship is not about who each of you is separately, it's about what happens when the two of you come together.

What does this person bring out in you? Does their kindness make you feel relaxed and cared for? Or does their anxiety provoke your anxiety? You must understand what qualities they bring out in you, because this is who you'll be whenever you're with them. A client met a guy who seemed perfect on paper. For instance, if it's important that you're heard and listened to, but people in your life consistently cut you off when you're talking, dismiss what you have to say, or aren't listening, then every time that happens, it's a dagger in your chest. This isn't how you want to live. When you know you value being heard and listened to, then you're able to create that boundary that says, Hey, it feels very hurtful and disrespectful when I'm interrupted. When I'm talking, can you please let me finish? If they continue to interrupt, then you get to act. You can say, If I'm interrupted, the conversation will end or whatever choice feels better for you. When you're not used to standing up for yourself, it can feel like you're jumping off a cliff. But the more you practice and know your values, the more it will become second nature. We know how frustrating experiences and people can be. You may feel like you don't have many--if any--choices. If the disrupters are allowed to continue disruptive behavior, disruption expands. Whether you speak of the parents in a family or the leaders of a country, the well-being of the whole must come first or the whole falls apart. The challenge to find harmony is the same regardless of who is seeking it--two people, two countries, or two planets. Although this article speaks of step-parenting, peace is found the same way regardless of who is seeking it, and regardless of the circumstances leading up to that need. Energy is always testing, and children are no exception.