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Then flatten your chest, pushing the air back to the belly while arching your back. This situation deteriorated until Ellen felt compelled to find a place of her own. When that didn't work out due to the expense, the resulting argument ended with Janet striking Ellen. Naturally, she blamed everything on Brad. Things got so bad that Brad turned to alcohol and even considered suicide. Soon he was abusing opioids because they stopped the pain he felt from his marriage. Depression and worsening anxiety led him to lose his job when he asked for a leave of absence to go into treatment. They all lied to me, said Brad, pretended to be my friends to get info just to in turn use it against me to help them fire me. It was also during this time that Brad discovered Janet had been having numerous affairs. Eventually, Janet took the kids and left, complaining about Brad's drug problem, saying that it was unacceptable. Brad is now left to pick up the pieces and fears that his children are starting to exhibit the same problems that he did. All of these factors helped her metabolize estrogen in a more healthy way. She added some chicken or fish to her lunch and dinner, increased her intake of vegetables, and took my recommended supplements every day. She was surprised at what a difference even those few changes made. She began to feel both more calm and more energized as well as more hopeful and confident about the future. After a month, Chantelle decided she was ready to try my whole plan. She felt the benefits immediately. Eating a hormone-healthy diet, getting good sleep, and taking the herbal remedies I prescribed helped Chantelle tap into new reserves of energy, stamina, and hopefulness. These hormonal changes enabled her to cope with stress differently and rebuild her physical and emotional resources. To her great relief, she also began losing weight.

I feel clearer, stronger, and happier, she told me. Continue this pumping movement until you need to take a breath. When you need to exhale, do so out of your mouth. When washing clothes or dishes by hand, scrub the items in a relaxed way. Breathe naturally and steadily. Pay attention to every movement, to the soap and water. Now you are feeling and sensing water. Become totally aware of the sensations of touching water. Maintain a half-smile and follow your breath. If your mind wanders, come back by maintaining a half-smile and following your breath. This will bring you back. Again, as far as Janet was concerned, everything that had happened, from the business with his mother to the affairs, the mental health issues, and the drug and alcohol abuse was Brad's fault even though it was predicated on her narcissistic abuse. Brad manifested a number of traits associated with narcissistic abuse syndrome. He couldn't leave the situation. One would think that after Janet slapped his mother on top of all the other trouble, he would have reached the point of ending things. He didn't. It's likely he justified this by saying his children needed him, though it is just as likely that if there were no kids involved, he would have stayed anyway. He could not trust anyone and saw the worst motives in the actions of the people around him, especially his coworkers. While this could point to a level of narcissism within Brad, we should remember that he was burned out by what he'd experienced at home. Suffering and unable to cope with his life as it was crumbling around him, Brad turned to drugs and alcohol to ease the pain, which just made matters worse.

In other words, this once happy and productive individual lost himself, becoming little more than a distorted reflection of the image of him that his narcissistically abusive wife held. It's hard sometimes to make sure I eat first thing in the morning and to stick to your three meals plus two snacks--sometimes it's just a lot of work eating that often! But it's such a relief to finally lose weight! Chantelle's experience is a good example of what happens with many of my patients. Although you get the best results from following my entire 28-day plan right from the start, you may not be able to make so many big changes so quickly. You may need to move into a hormone-healthy diet and lifestyle step by step. That's fine. Do the steps that work for you, do them at your own pace, and don't give up. You may be satisfied with the results of these initial changes and choose to stop there or they may give you the strength and the motivation to go further. To get enough fiber, make sure you sit down to a plate that is half full of colorful vegetables. Eating a healthy, lean-protein diet generally leaves us with more energy and stamina, while supporting our neurotransmitters with the right vitamins, minerals, proteins, and healthy fats improves mood, energy, focus, and sleep. When you have finished, you should feel as clean as your clothes or dishes. Imagine that your skin is like a knitted bodysuit that covers all of you, something comfortable that your grandmother or aunt made for you. As you inhale through your nose, feel how the knitted strands stretch and spread apart, creating spaces between them all over your body. As you exhale, feel how the strands retract and the fibers become more dense and opaque. Enjoy the whole feeling of the body swelling and retracting, filling and emptying. Deliberately take in a very deep breath and as soon as your lungs are full, immediately exhale through your mouth. Walk in stillness, act and work in harmony with the middle way. The serenity that emanates from you will create peace and all things will flourish. Tranquility is achieved when you are in harmony with all beings and all situations, knowing that everything is precisely the way it is meant to be.

Sometimes simply being conscious of breathing in and breathing out can move you into a place of greater peace, health, and awareness. The key thing for Brad and anyone else suffering from a narcissist's abuse to remember is that it's not their fault. If you are reading this, recognizing your own pain in these stories, it's not your fault. Just as there is no shame in being an assault victim, there is no shame in suffering from narcissistic abuse syndrome. You are the victim of a hurt that was perpetrated upon you by someone you trusted, someone who should have been the last person in the world to harm you. As painful and disorienting as narcissistic abuse syndrome can be, it can be stopped and treated. Do You Have Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome? While a true diagnosis can only be had through a licensed therapist, there are certain things you can look for that, if present, indicate that you should consider getting help. The following questions are based on the symptoms of people suffering from narcissistic abuse syndrome. The more Yes answers you have, the more likely it is that you are suffering from it. Do you feel disassociated from your experiences? Balancing our hormones through diet also improves our sex drive, as well as feelings of being sexy and sensual. Generally, the right diet helps us burn calories, create lean muscle, bring down excess levels of estrogen, and increase levels of progesterone, leading to a healthy hormone profile. And remember that creating lean muscle increases overall metabolic function, which is great both for balancing our sex hormones and for losing weight. It's difficult to stabilize your blood sugar and your insulin long term when you're eating only vegetable protein, and all too often carbs become the go-to choice. A vegetarian or vegan diet also means you must be extremely careful when choosing your sources of protein and combining different foods to get complete proteins. My patients often start out eating a healthy vegetarian or vegan diet but then start slipping. Before they know it, they end up with debilitating fatigue and other serious symptoms--all of which clear up almost immediately once they add a little fish or chicken to their diets. I loved being a vegetarian, and I didn't want to stop. But I've felt so terrible for so long--and as soon as I started eating fish the way you told me to, I started feeling terrific.

I just can't argue with that. Read through these affirmations as you breathe, allowing the words to become part of the rhythm of your breath. Feel free to re-read any of these affirmations multiple times as you breathe, until the words sink in and feel real. Breathing in deeply, I am aware that I'm breathing in deeply. Breathing out slowly, I am aware that I'm breathing out slowly. Breathing in deeply, I feel my body, from my toes through the top of my head. Breathing out slowly, I feel my body, from the top of my head down through my toes. Breathing in deeply, I feel peace moving up through the soles of my feet and out through the top of my head. Breathing out slowly, I feel peace washing through my head and down through my toes. Breathing in deeply, I feel joy moving through every cell of my body. Breathing out slowly, I feel joy moving through every cell of my body. Feeling detached from your environment, either emotionally or physically, as well as problems with perception, memory, or your sense of self are classic signs of trauma. Related thoughts and feelings are compartmentalized to block out the trauma and to keep the real horror of your situation at bay. This can lead to a number of unhealthy things such as addiction, obsessions, repression, and other ways to avoid pain. Are you always watching what you say or do around your abuser? It is common to avoid anything that is connected with the trauma in a bid to avoid repeating it. That means when you are around your abuser, you are hyper-aware of what you are saying and doing, tailoring your activities so as not to antagonize them. It is a fruitless endeavor because the abuse has nothing to do with you, what you say or your actions, but rather the emotional tides of the abuser. This behavior leads to an erosion of your ability to be assertive, set boundaries, and develop healthy relationships. Do you sacrifice who you are to your abuser?