For example, I work well late at night and in silence. So when I'm writing my articles I do this around 8-11 at night. I then schedule easier tasks like emails first thing in the morning or in the evening. Think about your tasks and your energy and how to pace out your day and your week. If you're dialed in to frustration, you might walk in, see the line, and immediately focus on the fact that you have no control over your position in line or the speed at which it moves. With anger, you would focus on the violation of your right to good service. With sadness, you may flash on what you're missing out on by being in this line, like precious time with your family. In each of these scenarios, that's your emotion radar at work. Everything that happens to us is filtered through our belief systems. Behind every feeling is a belief, and that belief colors what we see and how we respond. In other words, the feeling may not be a direct result of what is actually happening but of what we believe is happening. Challenge the belief and you have the opportunity to assess clearly the merits of that feeling. Let's put this to a real-life test. Imagine that you've been working very long hours for the past several weeks to complete a crucial project. The cost of employing an observer to write behavior descriptions, and later to integrate them with the sound recording, is prohibitive. There are also other difficulties involved. If a desk microphone is used, severe pounding on the table on which it stands may break it. The use of a hanging microphone entails prohibiting any throwing of objects in its vicinity. If the recording machine is itself in the playroom, it has to be protected from the child's tender ministrations. Thus there may be danger of making the therapist into a policeman.

However, where the child is not too aggressively active, recording can actually aid the therapy process. If the child is permitted to play back some of his recorded material, embarrassment is the usual first reaction. After this phase, surprising insights may occur. These are usually of the variety, I didn't realize I was being so bossy, or So that's how I've been acting! A useful technique to help get into the flow, instill a sense of urgency and set realistic time blocks is the Pomodoro Technique which was developed in the 1980s by Francesco Cirillo. This technique breaks down work into 25- minute intervals using a timer. The intervals are divided by breaks of 5 minutes. Face Your Fear It is normal to have little fear. As a matter of fact, fear can help protect you from danger. Your fear may help you recognize when to do dangerous things, or it may help you make safer choices. However, you may find yourself worrying about things that are not actually dangerous, such as public speaking. Fearing public speaking can hinder you from promoting your career or participating in traditions such as toasting at your best friend's wedding. If you would like to travel to Europe for a holiday, but the fear of flying stops you, you may feel that fear stands in your way of realizing your dreams. Night after night, you've been burning the midnight oil. After many weeks of this, you come home after a particularly tough day, particularly late, and as you walk through the front door of your home, you realize immediately that the atmosphere is frosty. All is not well. You're confronted at the door by your spouse or significant other, who says, You know what, I'm sick of this. You're a workaholic, and you simply don't make our relationship a priority. In that moment, what thoughts would run through your mind?

What would you feel and do? THE ANGER RADAR Anger is a very normal response here. Your face flushes, your muscles tense, and your heart starts pounding. A study of this particular problem has never been conducted, and might well be worth the attempt. Attempts to Analyze Play Therapy Protocols The process of play therapy, as distinct from its outcomes, has thus far been subjected to only two research studies. Landisberg and Snyder (108) studied the protocols of four children between the ages of five and six years. The work of three therapists was involved. Three of the cases were judged successful on the basis of reports of behavior outside the therapy hours; Presumably, these cases were not phonographically recorded. The aim of the study was the analysis of client and therapist responses in order to determine their trends throughout the course of therapy. The method of analysis used was that developed by Snyder for adult cases, and already referred to in article 4, above. Briefly, the procedure was to divide the protocols into idea units which were then categorized. If you find that fear causes you to shrink or cause bigger problems for you, facing your fear may help you learn to cope better and eventually overcome it. The common way to face fear is to assess the risk, develop an action plan, find a therapist, and make sure not to completely avoid the fear. However, you may need to first decide whether it is necessary to face fear if this is not part of daily life. Positive thinkers have the courage to face their fears because they know that it must be done in order for a positive change to happen. A person who denies that he feels pain in his abdomen because he wants to be positive about it may just as well end up in the ER for appendicitis or worse. Positive thinking means looking our challenge square in the face and knowing you will be able to overcome them.

The positive thinker would have had a check-up and would know that he could take medication and measures to make everything all right. Do what you love The best way to relate to our work is choosing it. The right livelihood depends on conscious choice. Your thought feed would probably go something like this: I don't believe this. I'm not doing this job for my health. We agreed on a lifestyle, a couple of kids, a mortgage, and two cars. To fund that lifestyle, I need to keep this job. Frankly, I could do with a little more support from you right now. As you now know, the anger thought feed is all about feeling a violation of your rights--in this particular case, the right to have support from your partner in a time of need. For some, this is not a one-off. Since childhood, you may have been operating with a built-in radar that scans your world for violation: Who's taking advantage of me? How and where am I getting cheated? The reality is that if you scan hard enough for something, you'll find it, even if it's not there or is misdirected. Therapist statements were classified as to content. Client statements were classified as to content and feeling. Re-categorization of three interviews after a three-month interval resulted in duplication of the original classifications from 72 to 85 per cent of the times. Inter-scorer reliability ranged from 45 per cent to 76 per cent. This is considerably lower than that reported by Seeman (180), whose work has already been outlined in article 4. The discrepancy may be a function of the use of a relatively untrained judge by Landisberg and Snyder.

It was found that 75 per cent of therapist responses fell into the nondirective category (simple acceptance, recognition of feeling, re-statement of content). This is in fair agreement with the 85 per cent and 63 per cent reported by Seeman and by Snyder, respectively, for adult cases. Interpretations comprised 5 per cent of all therapist responses. This may be compared with the 8 per cent reported by Snyder and the 1 per cent by Seeman. Unfortunately, since we learn to act in accordance with the words, values and expectations of others very early on, we often find that we have come a long way before we realize that we have not really chosen our job. Changing our lives is usually the start of maturity, because it means correcting one's choices unconsciously without thinking or deliberation. The ability to choose a job is never easy. You should have the courage to act according to your values and be willing to accept the consequences of the choices you make. The ability to choose means you should not allow fear to control or restrain you even if your choices may require you going against your fear or wishes of the people you admire and love. Sometimes choices force us to leave safe and familiar arrangements. Abraham Maslow was the first to study and describe this healthy personality, calling them self-actualization. This sentence just means overall growth. These people always take risks to ensure that they are born as an external expression of their inner true self. They have their own sense of value, and may try, be creative, and ask what they require. To quote Aristotle, Anybody can become angry--that is easy. But to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way--that is not within everybody's power and is not easy. ANGER FACT: Getting angry causes stress not just in your head but also in your heart. According to a study published in the Journal of the American College of Cardiology, anger sets off electrical impulses in the heart that can increase the likelihood of arrhythmias. Other studies have shown that patients who have heart attacks most frequently report being angry right before the event. THE ANXIETY RADAR