For most people, that's too ugly of a proposition, so we go for the half-baked, easy solutions that don't work. That's what Shane concluded. He's content enough with the ridiculousness of his mediocre life to continue living as the victim of what life throws at him. And, you know what, good for Shane. It's odd to applaud an apathetic man, but at least he has accepted that he'll never change. It's a melancholy applause, but it's better than not addressing your trust issues and believing you still want to change. I'd rather you accept that your life will never get better, than continue lying to yourself that you'll eventually figure it out. Gretchen's Life from The Happiness Project He really was my only safe parent, and I knew what he did was supposed to be bad, but how could I be angry? I was more scared I would lose him. I felt like I had to defend and protect my dad. My mom was crying so hard, I just wanted her to stop. I wanted to do anything to make her feel better. It is not uncommon for children to take sides. They may blame one or both parents. Maybe if my mom wasn't always so angry with my dad he wouldn't have done what he did. My dad is really a good guy so I don't know why Mom is making such a big deal of this. No one should have boyfriends or girlfriends when they are married. The leaky gut has been associated with other autoimmune diseases, such as type 1 diabetes. Without insulin, our bodies are unable to process sugars and convert them to storage in the form of fat.

The link between how the leaky gut triggers immune reactions that attack the pancreas in some people and cause type 1 diabetes, and in others creates lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, or multiple sclerosis is not clear. Each person has different genetic predispositions and environmental triggers. Importantly, there are other environmental triggers for inflammation beside diet and gut permeability; Environmental triggers can cause a leaky gut. Most of the time, a trigger is a food we eat. Food triggers are different for different people. When you eliminate a trigger, you can eliminate the inflammation. What is unclear, however, is how much of a role the imbalance in gut bacteria has on triggering the leaky gut versus the role of genetic predisposition to some food sensitivity. Gretchen is the exact opposite of apathy. She's a woman who's interested, passionate and enthusiastic about her life. Even better than that, she is a REAL PERSON! How Gretchen spent an entire year of her life inspired millions of readers to address issues in their own lives. While Shane may be the most extreme example of a pathetically apathetic human being, Gretchen is a great example of the proactive, passionate human being we need to be. Gretchen Rubin asked a question that everyone has likely asked themselves, What do I want from life, anyway? It's a funny question coming from Gretchen, because she's already been quite accomplished at this point in life. She graduated with an undergraduate degree and law degree from Yale and became editor-in-chief for the Yale Law Journal. She clerked for a judge in the U. Court of Appeals and with Justice Sandra Day O'Connor in the U. That just isn't the way it is supposed to be. My dad really hurt my mom and that's not right!

Some of the children said they had no awareness of the behavior until disclosure was made to them, and then they were shocked. They said that to hear about the behavior was a negative experience. We don't know if their negative experience was due to the behavior's impact on their lives because the parents were now visibly reacting to the consequences, or the children's confusion as to what it meant about their parent and how they understood the words sex addiction. While most parents would like to believe their children are unaware, in fact, many children said they either sensed or knew. While some children were shocked and confused by the disclosure, some found immediate relief and/or validation. They finally understood why they were feeling confused, fearful, or anxious. I was initially so shocked, my stomach kind of dropped. I was thinking, I can't believe I am hearing this. In other words, will a food sensitivity alone trigger inflammation and illness in a genetically predisposed person, or do you also need dysbiosis (an unhealthy combination of gut bacteria)? We believe that you need the whole package: genetic predisposition, exposure to a sensitized food, and abnormal gut flora. Presumably, the gut flora changes based on what someone eats, and certain gut changes increase risk for a leaky gut. These gut alterations, and resulting high levels of LPS, also seem to be associated with increased intestinal permeability, and the host immune system eventually reaches a constant state of chronic inflammation. This means that mice fed a high-fat diet could not create tight adhesions between their cells; She had a genetic predisposition to disease. She had food sensitivity to dairy and abnormal gut flora: the perfect storm. This information is groundbreaking but still in the early stages; The gut likely holds the key to so many inflammatory conditions. Studies are ongoing to link high-fiber diets to increased SCFAs and determine whether that diet will reduce inflammatory conditions. Supreme Court. She then turned to working as a lecturer with the Yale Law School and Management School, in addition to serving as a chief advisor for the Federal Communications Commission.

She's also married to a great guy, who works in the finance world, and has two kids, living and thriving in New York City. Simply put, she's already doing a lot of good things. What Gretchen dealt with was something different. As she puts it, I wasn't depressed and I wasn't having a midlife crisis, but I was suffering from midlife malaise--a recurrent sense of discontent and almost a feeling of disbelief. Can this be me? It's often a recurring thought for anyone who's naturally a go-getter, which Gretchen undoubtedly is. This first article, The Happiness Project, was a NewYorkTimes Best-Seller and two of the next three articles she would release also received the same acclaim. She's not joking around with her life! It just blew me away and at the same time incredible relief, wow! I was not crazy. I had known all along! I think a lot of parents think that their kids don't know. I think that is a huge mistake. We know almost everything our parents do. We aren't stupid. We may not know exactly what it is but we know enough to wonder, Why is Mom or Dad doing this? I think disclosure is a good thing. Rationale for Disclosure to Children But Wait, There is More? The Gut-Brain Axis

There is even more to this story. While Hippocrates said back in 460 BC that all diseases begin in the gut, our understanding of its importance has been relatively recent. The gut-brain axis is a concept that was established in the 1880s and recognizes the connection between our brains and our guts, which occurs via the autonomic nervous system (the same nervous system we talked about previously). It consists of nerve branches that connect the brain to the other organsand is the control center for subconscious activity, such as breathing, swallowing, urinating, and digestion. The autonomic nervous system is divided into enteric (nervous system of the gut), sympathetic (fight or flight), and parasympathetic nervous systems (rest and recharge), which all play a role in regulating gastrointestinal function. These connections are established via the vagus nerve, which provides fibers from the brain all the way to the transverse colon. Stimulation of the vagus nerve causes not only variations in the heart rate, but also changes in gut motility. Gut motility is the activity of processing our food remnants into stool and removing all the important nutrients. And, yet, she oddly seems to face a sense of discontentment. As she puts it: So, in the high-achieving, Gretchen kind-of-way, she decides to dedicate an entire year to making her life happier. She would embark on what she calls a Happiness Project. Every month of the year, she would dedicate it to a certain theme of activities and behavioral changes. She started the month of January with Boosting Her Energy by doing activities like going to sleep earlier, organizing the home more efficiently and exercising better. Then in April, it would shift to Lightening Up by singing in the morning and acknowledging the reality of people's feelings. Then in August, she would focus on Contemplating the Heavens by reading Memoirs of Catastrophe and keeping a gratitude notearticle. What's great about how she writes this article is that she doesn't ignore the odd nature of this challenge. How much better can life really become by doing this? So the question is: why would you even tell your children? There is no discounting the difficulty of your decision to disclose.