How would that be a preemptive strategy to protect your self-esteem? If you fail the test, you can say, Well, it's because I had this killer hangover from getting plastered the night before. And if you happen to do well, this makes your success all the more remarkable. That way, even though you're doing something likely to hinder (handicap) your own performance, you can attribute your failure to the excuse (eg, partying) and keep your self-esteem intact. Self-handicapping Placing obstacles in the way of one's own success to protect self-esteem from a possible future failure. People self-handicap when they are especially focused on the implications of their performance for self-esteem rather than on getting the rewards associated with success (Greenberg et al. In addition, Berglas and Jones (1978) showed that self-handicapping stems from uncertainty about one's competence. Practice staying in solitude. Get rid of the electronic noise, cell phones, televisions, computers, etc Seek inner guidance in your choices and actions. Write your personal mission statement. This could be on a post-it note, a journal, or as a reminder on your phone. This statement must reflect positive affirmations on who you are, what you want to be in the world, and the changes you wish to effect. Do some light reading. Read sacred texts like the Bible, the Bhagavad Gita, or yoga sutra translations. Find the one you resonate with and study it deeply. Learn to live every day like you know that even your smallest actions have a ripple effect and influence the world. This helps you adopt a more mindful approach to living. FOCUSING MY PROFESSIONAL LIFE TO SERVE THE CHARITY My appetite to serve the TD Threshold was growing.

But as an employee working 9-5, I had limited time to invest in the charity. Instead of asking myself, How can I make more time during evenings and weekends? I decided to ask, If I were to design my ideal life, how could I do work that would allow me the freedom to focus on the TD Threshold as much as I wanted? After some deep soul-searching, it became clear that my professional life wasn't aligning with my newly defined core value of service. Although I worked with awesome people at an incredible company, made great money, traveled the world, and had the best boss ever, I continued exploring questions about my purpose for being here. The more I asked questions like Why am I here? So I started asking three very powerful new questions: What are my superpowers? People who have experienced success in the past but are uncertain about whether they can sustain success in the future are the most likely to self-handicap. Self-handicapping has been used to explain a wide variety of behaviors in which individuals appear to sabotage their own success: abusing alcohol or other drugs, procrastinating, generating test anxiety, or not preparing for an exam or performance. Indeed, perhaps the most common forms of self-handicapping involve denying one's desire for success and not trying one's hardest (eg, Reich & Wheeler, 2016). If you don't try your hardest, then you can attribute poor performance to a lack of effort rather than a lack of ability. Psychologists often attribute lack of effort to feelings of helplessness or fear of success. But often instead what people are doing is self-handicapping. How do we know? When people who fear they will not succeed on a task are given a handy excuse for why they might fail (such as the presence of distracting music), they actually perform better (Snyder et al. The excuse reduces their concern with protecting their self-esteem, which frees them to put in their best effort. Of course, not all people self-handicap to the same extent. Look at everyone and everything as a mirror through which you can discover something about yourself. Ask yourself daily, How does this virtue I appreciate or this vice I detest in another reflect an aspect of me?

Yoga reminds us that surrender is the ultimate freedom (Isvara pranidhana): Tapas, Svadhyaya, and Isvara pranidhana form the transformative aspect of yoga called kriya yoga. We have seen the importance of discipline and contentment in spiritual practice, but even those can become very boring when done without devotion. Devotion provides us with enthusiasm needed to follow the other life lessons taught in yoga. Devotion makes us choose to intentionally tread the path, to give time, energy, and our lives in the practice of seeking the divine. The sutra of devotion in 2. Practicing yoga deepens our human relationships and well as our relationship with the divine. Tips for Practicing Devotion to God in Our Daily Lives Build a simple place of worship or an altar with items that represent your connection to the divine. I see this as our best natural talents. What are my passions? I see this as what lights us up. Who can I help? I see this as the person or group we most want to serve. My soul-searching led me to take a leap of faith and become an entrepreneur. In 2008, I decided to make a bold move and become a full-time speaker, coach, and author. I set out in search of higher purpose and deeper meaning in my work and personal life. Several months into my entrepreneurial journey, I attended a mastermind meeting, which consisted of a small group of business owners who gathered to help one another. I shared with everyone that I wasn't sure what my focus, brand, and overall business strategy should be. Some individuals are generally more likely to self-handicap than others (Kimble & Hirt, 2005). There is evidence that men are more likely than women to self-handicap, suggesting that women place relatively higher value on effort (McCrea et al.

The Better Than Average Effect THINK ABOUT Think for a moment about the percentage of the chores you do around your house or dorm. Then ask your roommate what percentage of the chores she thinks she does. We're betting the total will well exceed 100% (Allison et al. This example illustrates how people often overestimate the frequency of their own good deeds relative to those of others (Epley & Dunning, 2000). In fact, as we described in article 5, the average person thinks that she or he is above average on most culturally valued characteristics and behaviors (Alicke, 1985; Taylor & Brown, 1988). Make a mental note of where your actions come from. Do they spring from a well of fear, ego, or love? Only act on those feelings rooted in love. Offer everything that you have and are in service to divine love. Let your actions be for the greatest good of all involved. Learn to surrender to love to help you tap into shraddha (faith, inner strength) so that step by step, you surpass your challenges. Helpful Tips for Daily Practice Start Simple : There are a lot of positions that can be adopted by beginners. Do not do too much too soon. Do not attempt complicated postures because you fear the simple ones offer little or no benefits. How could I make money while keeping my focus on the TD Threshold? The six people around the table all looked at me as if the answer was obvious.

With one voice, they said, Front Row Everything! They enthusiastically explained that I could help people live life in the front row through speaking, coaching, articles, and hosting other live events that would bring attention, funds, and connections to the charity. They hit the nail on the head. Today, for example, each time I take the stage for a keynote presentation, I talk about the charity. Because of this, countless people have approached me to say something like, Hey Jon, if you ever need tickets for your recipients, just say the word. We've made connections that have given us access to front row seats we would never be able to secure otherwise, not to mention that it's saved our charity thousands of dollars from not having to purchase them. As Aaron Hurst wrote in The Purpose Economy, Purpose isn't a cause; Purpose is a verb, not a noun. Clearly, we can't all be above average on these characteristics, so how do people maintain this perception that they're superior? When people perform poorly on some task, they tend to overestimate how many other people also would perform poorly. In contrast, when people perform very well on a task, they tend to underestimate how many other people also would perform well. So people think their shortcomings are pretty common but their strengths are rather unique (Campbell, 1986). Another way people avoid seeing themselves as having negative characteristics is to try to view others as possessing those traits which they fear they themselves possess. For example, if I fear that I'm overly hostile, I might be more likely to see others as hostile. Classic psychoanalytic psychologists such as Freud (1920/1955a), Anna Freud (1936/1966) and Carl Jung (Jung & von Franz, 1968) labeled this form of self-esteem defense projection. Assigning to others those traits that people fear they possess themselves. In one series of studies (Schimel et al. Participants then read about a person, Donald, whose behavior was ambiguously hostile (or dishonest). Remember, it is not only the poses that provide the benefits but the level of focus. Thus, simple poses like the cat-cow pose and the butterfly pose can get you transcendental levels of bliss with single-minded focus.