List as many ways as you can think of that DID has helped your loved one to survive. What does your friend or loved one do to function in daily life? If you are not sure, do you want to ask her if she is willing to share more with you? Why or why not? How do you feel about having someone in your life with DID? Be honest about the positives and negatives of such a relationship. If the behaviors of someone with DID are adaptive, why would treatment be needed? The answer is that adaptation can be progressive, so behavior that was useful at one time may need to be modified if it is to continue being helpful. The goals of therapy with DID clients vary, but all are geared toward helping the person function effectively in life and in an integrated, or conscious, fashion. The coping skills previously mentioned are based in part on past experiences and distorted beliefs. If you struggle with love, you'll attract someone who has issues with love. If you have issues with power, your partner will, too, although not necessarily in the same way. And then, it may not be that obvious. If one person is bossy because he fears he lacks power, his partner may be submissive because she fears finding her power. A couple may have problems with addiction, but while one is the addict, the other may be the co-dependent partner or the rescuer. If the shared issue is fear, one partner handles it by being bold and fearless, while the other person is timid and makes little to no decisions. Like often attracts like, but in an opposite way. In other words, in any relationship, one person makes pancakes, and the other one eats them. What that means is that typically, when a problem occurs, one partner wants to talk and work it out, while the other prefers to be quiet, to let things settle down and work themselves out. The more aggressive person pushes all of his buttons, and his refusal to deal with it pushes hers.

Here are some tips to do the breathing exercise. Take a deep breath but make sure it is from your diaphragm and not taken from your chest. Breathing from your chest will only make you gasp or run short of breath, but when you breathe with your belly, you will be able to fill your lungs with sufficient oxygen. When you breathe this way; Listen to the sound when you exhale as well as observe the breathing rhythm you make. Rather, breathe calmly and naturally. If every breath you make is long or short, so be it. The point is that you should observe the breathing you make and not to ensure whether the breathing is long or short. The point is to practice looking into the breathing rhythm and not to know problems and meanings of every breath. That is what mindfulness is all about. The scripts are written by marketing pros from high-rise advertising agencies who know what they're doing. So we end up settling for counterfeit versions of the lives we were meant to live, instead of lives filled with real magic. You may have settled for a counterfeit version of your life because the crushing of your wonder permitted you to buy the lie or because the buying of the lies, over time, crushed your wonder. The reason varies from story to story, from person to person. You are a complex storytelling creature, and if wonder is a switch, then stories are the electricity that feeds that switch. One of wonder's greatest powers is that it changes the stories we tell ourselves. It can change the narrative that drives all our choices and behavior. Perhaps this is why in 1994 Steve Jobs, in a break room conversation at NeXT, while making a bagel, quipped, The most powerful person in the world is the storyteller. The storyteller sets the vision, values, and agenda of an entire generation that is to come. And the device on which I am writing this article.

For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. On some level all we really want is control. We want to decide where our life goes and what we do with this single, brief experience. For the life of me, I can't figure out how to wield such control, where we point ourselves in a good, great, meaningful direction, without discipline. Discipline is the literal focusing of your minutes and hours to an end that you deem good. If, however, you don't believe that you can become who you want to become or achieve what you want to achieve, you won't develop the necessary discipline to live how you want. There are certain myths in our society that, if believed, keep people from living grand, flourishing lives because it gives them a perceived valid reason to not try at all, they make effort pointless. Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right. There are success stories from every walk of life. Choose any of the most improbable among them as proof that you can do truly great things whether you're poor, middle class, rich, or anywhere in between, and you'll free yourself from the shackles that are disbelief and mediocrity claiming to keep you from living a life that you would deem as successful. You can catch yourself having old power-zapping autopilot reactions when you notice any or all of the following things about yourself in the moment: Your heart rate speeds up. Your breathing speeds up. Your voice suddenly gets much louder or much quieter You have a sudden flash of fear, anger, or harsh judgment. You suddenly feel aggressive or passive toward others you are with. When you are mindful of your reactions in the moment, you can be aware that your autopilot responses from old beliefs and memories may not be entirely fitting. For example, if, like me, your personal history brought you to a place of feeling separate and alone from others and you suddenly want to leave a situation because you think others don't want you included, that doesn't mean that others actually feel that way about you. You can purposefully and mindfully open your viewpoint to allow the possibility that other people may want genuine deeper connection with you than you have been open to in the past. Perhaps you entertain the thought that these others may be happy to include you in their conversation and laughter.

Sales professionals understand the importance of learning the techniques of body language in order to increase the sales of their company. Customers are attracted towards a product or a service, not only due to its features and due to benefits, but they also have a high recall due to the effective sales presentation made by the salesperson. To secure a strong business relationship, you must follow the tips mentioned below. Eye contact plays a vital role when you are explaining the features and benefits of your product or service to your customers. Eye contact establishes complete concentration, trustworthiness, and develops a strong emotional connect with your potential customer. You may look away for one or two seconds to maintain the natural eye contact and facilitate active listening. Open hands help you explain the specific features of the product or service. Palms facing upwards display acceptance; Take care about the factor of proximity between you and the customer. Explore your own personal space to make the sales presentation. These four kinds of illness meanings, and the variety of subtypes I have traced out in these articles, are not meant to be exhaustive. There are surely other types. But I believe that I have covered the most important varieties. My intention has been to set out a theoretical grid that we can use to analyze actual cases of chronic illness and thereby generalize from the issues outlined in these first articles. In the human context of illness, experience is created out of the dialectic between cultural category and personal signification on the one side, and the brute materiality of disordered biological processes on the other. The recurrent effect of narrative on physiology, and of pathology on story, is the source of the shape and weight of lived experience. That felt world combines feeling, thought, and bodily process into a single vital structure underlying continuity and change in illness. Coming to terms with this human dialectic transforms our understanding of the difficult life problems that issue from chronic illness and of how they are best treated; I turn now to detailed descriptions of the illness experiences of actual patients with distinctive illness problems. All the cases described in these articles have fictitious names to protect their real identity.

When you are doing work with the body deva, ask it to show you the energy that is resisting. For example, you are doing work exploring why you may have stomach pain and realize that your entire abdomen is not a part of your body map. When you begin to talk with your abdomen, it seems confused and doesn't give any answers. You realize that on some level there may be resistance, or some form of protection blocking you from connecting to your abdomen. You ask your body deva to show you what part of your abdomen is holding this resistance. While it can be the whole abdomen, usually it is only a segment, or small portion, of what you are working with. You will then ask your body deva to see this energy clearly, as a specific color separate from how you view the rest of your abdomen. You can then try asking that color (or that resistance) to step aside so you can work with the rest of your abdomen. You will then work with the area that remains, realizing that you do not need to heal everything in your abdomen at once. If you realize that your resistance covers half of your abdomen and you successfully work with the other half, that is still a lot of progress. Dissociation is a means of survival, but if an individual continues to live as though the past and the present are the same, their quality of life will be greatly diminished. When that happens, what was once adaptive becomes maladaptive. In the next article, we discuss treatment options. First, though, reflect on the questions on articles 52 and 53. Create a space in which you can think about what DID means to your own life. Diagnosing the Disorder Nancy had struggled with depression and eating disorders for years. Her treatment had consisted of both individual therapy and inpatient programs, yet nothing seemed to work. As her life became more and more out of control, she called a friend and begged for help. Nancy's description of her life pointed to the possibility of a dissociative disorder.