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But, before you throw a desk and storm out of your workplace, consider this. If it really is an awesome company you're trying to work for, they'll want to know where you previously worked at. What do they need to know about your relationship with them? If it's sour, that doesn't shine a positive light on you. It creates doubt. Even if it's a completely terrible job you are in, and everyone there is annoying to work with, be careful to not operate within the box. Remember our brief lesson from the article Leadership & Self-Deception? Communicating to the future employer that your current job is shitty because of that bad boss and those annoying-ass coworkers and how unbearable your days are? When your loss is too painful to acknowledge you move into denial. You minimize, rationalize. In order to get to acceptance, you move through anger. And you have so much to be angry about. Somewhere in the process guilt sets in and that leads to bargaining. This bargaining is often between you and your God or Higher Power: God, if you would just make him stop this behavior, I promise I will___. Then you experience sorrow, the sadness deep and profound. You feel too helpless to respond. With progress through these stages, you come to acceptance, acceptance of the reality for what it is. When loss is chronic and the likelihood of abandonment looms at emotionally painful times, you are more apt to bypass the shock stage of grief and quickly proceed to the denial stage. Some legumes also provide a little calcium, but not a significant amount. Legumes also contain resistant starches.

When resistant starches reach the colon, they ferment and form short-chain fatty acids, such as butyrate. Butyrate is a short chain fatty acid, and its production appears to be important in maintaining colonic health and lowering our risk of chronic illness. Research suggests that butyrate also is vital in lowering insulin resistance, risk of stroke, and high cholesterol. It also appears related to a diminished risk of cancer. Caloric Density Another way to look at foods is based on their caloric density. Jeff Novick at the McDougall Center in Santa Rosa, California, is a huge proponent of this approach to food. Think of caloric density as the amount of calories per ounce of food. Now you sound unbearable. Imagine, after six months of waiting to go to the employer of your dreams, you finally sit in on an interview. When they ask you about your previous employer, you'll be able to justify your value with clear indicators, like showing up on time, all the time. You're dependable on the job and work efficiently. You go above and beyond by addressing issues that aren't in your jurisdiction. You compliment coworkers, in order to make the environment more pleasant. You provide such good service that it surprises customers, and they remark about your work. That's valuable. It's particularly valuable when it's a consistent trait in your workday, not just when you feel like it. Furthermore, it's even more valuable when your dream employer finds out about the truly shitty circumstances you dealt with WHILE being an A+ employee. If you have made a habit of employing denial to cope with your feelings, you have become so skilled at this that you may have difficulty even identifying a situation as a loss. You may think the following:

I really didn't expect him to show up. It didn't really hurt. Anger is a natural response to loss. It is a protest, an attempt to retrieve what is gone or never was. Feeling anger can be a healthy reaction when your rights have been stomped on. It heightens your awareness and propels you to act. Without it you may lack the courage to speak out, to seek a just resolution, and to protect yourself from further harm. If you don't allow yourself to feel indignant when someone hurts you, if you don't know that you are bruised or enraged, who will encourage you to question what your relationship is worth? Water and fiber in food will lower its calorie density, while fat and oil increase it. Studies show that overall, people eat about the same amount of food every day, but if you eat, say, half a pound of calorie-dense food such as glazed donuts, you'll take in many more calories than if you eat half a pound of lettuce, which has very little calorie density. We also need water and fiber in foods to increase satiety. Consider that chili is high in caloric density, but if you add vegetables to chili, its density will be less because vegetables are full of fiber and water. Studies show that people who eat lower caloric-density foods can eat more food by weight and still take in fewer calories than those who eat high-fat, high-caloric-density foods. You will also feel full because you haven't restricted your portions. The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) points out that people who eat lower caloric-density foods can consume fewer calories without changing how much they eat. If you eat low-calorie-dense foods, you don't have to restrict your portions. You can take in the same amount of food and maybe even more, but with that, you will take in fewer calories and still feel full. Then, we can eat an abundance of beans, lentils, and chickpeas in our diets. Take the lesson from Dr Peterson. Clean up your life.

Take the lesson from Tim Redmond. Be fruitful, THEN multiply. But, wait, what does it look like to be fruitful, then multiply? Let's say you want to lose 20 pounds, before the summer comes, for the summer bod goals. An admirable endeavor. You currently don't go to the gym and your eating habits aren't the best. Where do you start? Well, I think we all know where the painful beginnings lie. Who will draw the line and say enough is enough? Who will be your voice? Inability to feel anger is as dangerous as the inability to feel pain and it will render you just as defenseless. Acknowledging pain allows you to address it. When you have been hurt, anger is a natural, valid response. It can be a gift, as it provides a feeling of empowerment. Suddenly you do not doubt yourself. You can do whatever needs to be done. Anger gives you energy to cope; Anger's vector is always forward--to push away the source of pain. They are our main protein source, so we eat them at least once every day--usually a spinach salad for lunch with beans on top. You can put loads of vegetables and beans in the salad and feel full without adding croutons or French dressing (which is processed).

Instead, make a hummus-based dressing, or use balsamic vinegar to flavor the salad. We find that the beans themselves are quite flavorful and often carry the taste of the salad. Oatmeal also is good for you, but adding bananas and raspberries makes it even better because it lowers caloric density while adding the multiple benefits of the fruits. Eating bread is okay, but adding hummus and an abundance of raw green vegetables makes it delicious, and the vegetables lower the caloric density. A diet with these qualities is filling and provides the essential nutrients required in daily living without unnecessary toxins. Adding those raw veggies and fruits will make all the difference in reaching your wellness goals. Our intention is to not restrict your portions, within reason. If you eat the right foods all of the time, you won't have to weigh yourself every day or count points or calories. You need to go to the gym regularly. The more frequently you venture to the gym, the faster the results, in most cases. At a minimum, you should go three times per week. It's better to go more times, but let's start with three trips. Then, along with that, we need to eat healthier, correct? Well, what do you eat on a regular basis? The first step that personal trainers often do is have you journal what you eat in a given week. But, since you are a bright individual, you already know some foods you should remove or include into your diet. Foods like cake, candy and desserts can be cut out. Going to fast food restaurants does not help, either. In anger it is easier to forget the other person's needs. All that counts is your pain and your needs, not theirs.