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They plan for their old age financially, socially, and medically. If you have a China Doll Mom, you may already be worrying that your own older years will be spent with mother in the guest room. You may be concerned that, if push comes to shove, mom's welfare will come before yours. But the question of taking care of mom in her old age is not all you struggle with. The nature of the entire relationship is an issue here. Check if you are correct. When you remember ten such sets without a mistake, increase the number of cards from four to five. Go on increasing the number as your memory improves. Then close your eyes and remember them in detail. MEDITATION AND ITS NUANCES Human beings have always experienced it - from birth to the end of their lives. Some may feel it more and some less but none can escape it. And stress harms the system as nothing else does. It has been seen that during times of stress 50,000 IU of Vitamin A is depleted from the body in ten minutes, which means, even the healthiest person can be deficient in this vitamin in under two hours of stress. In the long run, stress causes immense damage to the body, mind and psyche resulting in wide and varied ailments and disorders. Mary Barra, CEO of General Motors, credits her success to the Mentors she has had throughout her career. As she puts it. When building your network of mentors, be honest about your mid- and long-term career goals, and how hard you are willing to work to achieve them. Then turn to those who best know you and your work. Earn their respect and trust so they will extend their personal capital to you with confidence and be your professional champion.

John Wooden writes in Success (September 2008), An individual needs to be open to being mentored. <a href=''>It</a> is our responsibility to be willing to allow our lives and our minds to be touched, moulded and strengthened by the people who surround us. <a href=''>Which</a> of the 12 key people and personalities do you have in your network, and which are you missing? <a href=''>When</a> I work through this process with my clients, they quickly realise that the network they thought they had isn't anything like the network they need to help them achieve any kind of success. <a href=''>But</a> don't worry, you're actually in a great position because you now know who you need in your network. <a href=''>David</a> Starr Jordan, the founding president of Stanford University, was fond of sharing these words with his students:Wisdom is knowing what to do next, skill is knowing how to do it, and virtue is doing it! So what do you need to do next? Decide what you want to achieve, obtain, reach, have and become in the next 12 months. For most people the norm is wishing and hoping that their goals will come true, rather than knowing and planning for their goals to come true. The art of narrowing your focus to the next 12 months is taking your vision, those long-term goals, and turning them into achievable, believable and desirable goals. Amat victoria curam is a Latin proverb first brought to my attention by my good friend and fellow speaker Malcolm McLeod. It translates as . This article is about being prepared to achieve those milestones that are vital for you to feel how you want to feel and that act as stepping stones to those long-term goals we spoke about in the previous article. It is about creating a series of dots that form an outline of a picture and then joining those dots together to make your picture come to life. Malcolm has another great saying: `Unfocused thoughts equal unaccomplished results. After a minute, let that focus go . Bringing your focus to both hands - fingers, palms, the backs of the hands - notice if they're warm, cold, clawed or relaxed. Let it go . Move your attention to your neck and shoulders, zooming into every area and focusing on different sensations as you scan. Now, up to your face: your chin, lips, cheeks, nose, eyes, forehead and the top of your skull.

Do you sense what facial expression you're making? When your focus drifts, as always, notice, be nice to yourself and refocus on the exact part of the face you were focusing on before. Next, try to feel your whole body from inside: your bones and muscles, where you're in contact with the chair, the skin wrapped around you and the air outside your skin. Try to feel the breath filling your body from your toes up to the top of your head, and out again like a bellows. In the last few minutes, come back to the sense of just sitting and breathing, feet on the ground, body on the chair. Like moving from a hot desert to a cool mountain retreat, each discovery of what darkens our path in life moves us toward higher, happier ground. And though we may not yet understand how this works in us, each time we catch a glimpse of one of our character shortfalls, we do so by the grace of a Living Light--a latent force for perfection that lives within us. And this same Higher Intelligence asks us, by its very presence within us, to see ourselves in its light. Through its illumination we discover that it is not negative to see the negative in us since it is the perfectly positive that makes this kind of seeing into ourselves possible. But we must be good patients! When it comes to seeing the truth of our lives, the late, great author Vernon Howard taught those who would listen that The medicine is bitter, but it heals. If we would heal the hidden hurt in us then we must learn that the initial bitterness of self-truthfulness is the frontrunner of our ultimate spiritual betterment. Our work is to concede to the bright prescription of higher self-honesty, regardless of how it tastes to us in those moments when we see ourselves as we are. Following are six eye-opening facts. They reveal areas in our lives where many of us have lived with our eyes closed, vainly hoping that if we don't see something regarding how we go about our lives, then it won't be able to hurt us. Everyone passed the box by. After a while I picked it up myself, and placed it, half open, on a cafe table. I stayed within sight but no one picked it up. Twenty minutes later I had grown tired of waiting. I left the box where it was and headed back home.

It felt like a suitable ending to a month that had felt like a failure from start to end. Sure, I had saved a lot of money--enough to save a person's life, according to the equations devised by the effective altruists. But I had not donated the money yet. It was still just resting in my account. After I got back home I noticed that I had a voice message from the sperm clinic. It lets you see what your intellect can't. Sleep is a socially sanctioned altered state, the sacred medium for dreams. I call sleep the little death. You close your eyes and shift from being body-centric to the nonmaterial, a supercreative metamorphosis. The big difference between sleep and death, however, is that with one you wake up in bed, while with the other your spirit just keeps going. No one instructs us in how to fall asleep or what to do after we've left our bodies. We must be trained to travel to our dreams and back without fear, a freedom to traverse boundaries. Sleep plays by different rules. While awake, you may sell girdles for a living, chase after your kids, or win a Miss or Mrs. America articleant, but in dreams you can go beyond such partial identities. The systemic, imbalanced incarceration of people based on poverty--people who have been convicted of no crime--is on its own an egregiously unjust punishment to suffer. But the personal costs of pretrial detention reach far beyond the endurance of incarceration itself. Jobs are lost as people languish in jail. As a result, rent goes unpaid, eviction notices are issued, and personal belongings are seized. People who cannot make bail have already proved themselves to be living without any kind of financial safety net.

The cumulative implications of these additional losses, then, can be insurmountable. And there are consequences of pretrial detention that are more wrenching still. The repercussions of imprisonment that plague those who've been sentenced to serve time ricochet in the same way through the families of pretrial detainees who are held behind bars without any determination of guilt. Nowhere is this grievous injustice more apparent to me than when I perform evaluations in the women's jail. Nearly half the mothers who are incarcerated in America are single parents. You may feel obliged to give mom only good news about yourself and your family; You avoid talking about yourself. It is easier to talk with her about her problems and fears. Any attempt to communicate directly with mom about your relationship with her is fraught with dangers. China Doll Moms often insulate themselves from conflictual feelings by getting anxious and upset. You may say something like, I want to have a real relationship with you, but some things are in the way. Often before you have completed your sentence, mom is crying, upset, or out of the room. The adult child feels guilty for hurting mom, especially if other siblings fuse with mom's self-victimization. The rest of the clan are often unable to understand the control and manipulation behind mom's demeanor. The siblings will then unite against the black sheep who is so mean to mother. To release stress, many methods have been devised the world over. Meditation is one and probably the most accepted. There are innumerable types of meditation, all equally effective. One needs to choose the right meditation to derive its full benefits. Importantly, the meditation must suit the temperament and limitations of the person attempting it.