Brain freeze may be new to you, but it's a significant problem if you have it. Let's go through these problems and, of course, some strategies for coping with them. That was slow and laborious. Then I realized I could use the "find and replace" tool in Microsoft Word. I would put in a phrase from page sixty-seven that sounded vaguely familiar and see where else that phrase occurred in the manuscript. But I was very afraid of losing something that wasn't actually a duplicate, so before cutting I would go back and recheck the first page. I did a lot of cutting and copying and a lot of rechecking to make sure I didn't lose anything. Whew! One of the things I'm learning is to plan ahead when starting a project or before applying a solution to a problem. Sometimes the attempt to solve one problem can create new problems. I type without a lot of niceties. For example, I don't type "ADD"; I type "add". Also I type "tho" and "thru" and "santa fe". So I used the "find and replace" tool. I put in "find add and replace it with ADD." That worked pretty well, except then I found things like, "ADDed" or "ADDiction" and had to correct those. I tried "find tho and replace it with though." So where I had typed "thought' it came out "thoughught". To become more authentic, Friedrich Nietzsche says, "Create your own values." This nineteenth-century German existentialist was among the most ardent defenders of authentic existence in the history of thought. "The noble kind of man," said Nietzsche, "experiences himself as a person who determines value and does not need to have other people's approval. ... He understands himself as something which in general first confers honor on things, as someone who creates values" (Nietzsche, 1954, sec.

260, 579). This involves looking at things in the opposite way you have been accustomed to looking at them. Instead of being a member of a docile herd, a virtual slave to others who seek to exploit you for their own self-aggrandizement, you can be a master. You can decide for yourself what is good or bad, right or wrong! Of course, this is an ideal, and you will never attain it perfectly, but aspiring to be such a "superman" (as Nietzsche calls it) can be an excellent antidote to making yourself dependent on the approval of others for self-validation. We reviewed some simple but powerful strategies for boosting your body's stress-fighting capacity in an earlier chapter, like consciously slowing down your rate of speech and actions, and thoughtful breathing. In addition to this, several other good habits can help you upgrade your body's stress-diffusing ability. These include important but often overlooked things like regular sleep, exercise, nutrition and supplements, and, in some cases, medication. Inadequate sleep can seriously impact the body's ability to serve as an effective stress surge protector. According to the National Sleep Foundation, people need between seven and nine hours of sleep per night for the body to fully heal, recharge, and restore its natural stress-fighting abilities. A person who is not especially stressed may function passably with less sleep, but the person who is going through a particularly anxious time, or who is naturally more anxious, is going to need more sleep to function just as well. Do you find yourself living life looking into your rearview mirror? You can look into the rearview mirror to see what is behind or is about to pass you, or you can look toward the future and go for it! Retroactive fault-finders focus on the mistakes they made in the past and dwell on how they are irretrievable. Clara was stuck in a tape loop. She would automatically slide into a refrain of, "I should never have left my family. I should have stayed at home and taken care of my mother. I should never have gone to work for that company. I should never have married that guy, I should never have cut my long hair." Her rearview mirror reinforced the fact that every choice she made was wrong. She was riddled with beat-up that were used as ammunition against her for every choice or decision she had ever made.

Retroactive Fault-Finders use the words "should," "ought," and "shouldn't have" with frequency. Albert Einstein lamented about his own contribution to the creation of the atomic bomb as is indicated in this sobering quote: "The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking ... the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker." Among many other benefits, in the deepest stages of sleep (N3 and REM), hormones are secreted that heal tissue damage and reduce cortisol levels caused by stress. Decreasing cortisol helps to reset the body's baseline stress level, making it more difficult for life events to trigger the body's fear-threat response. An article in the journal Neural Plasticity reported that during sleep the brain integrates learning and memory more effectively, which enables people to adapt to stress more effectively. The same article reported that sleep facilitates the formation of new neural connections in the brain that help diffuse the additional "load" placed on the nervous system by stressful events. As a rule, the more stressful we feel our lives are, the more sleep we need, and the more our bodies tell us to prioritize the habits that produce good quality sleep. The entire collapse of the world economy in 2008 was rooted in bad behavior, not bad technology. So why would we expect technology to solve the fundamental problems with human life if the problems are caused by lack of compassion or ethics? What technology will solve this? Even hyperrational scientists, futurists, and inventors succumb to the most irrational of feelings, compulsions, depression, sleep disorders, and resentment. I have met many people with impressive intellects and careers who are also admittedly addicted to antidepressants, sleep aids, and blood pressure medications because they have not learned the basic principles of happiness and health. I put in "find santa and replace it with Santa." That worked fine. "find fe and replace it with Fe." Not so fine. found a lot of things like "I am Feeling --" and "It takes Fewer--". I had to go through and change those. Just now I realize that if I had put in "find santa fe ---" instead of each word separately, it would have saved some trouble. I have ADD. I am not well organized.

I take shortcuts, like not capitalizing when I type, because I'm impatient and I'm trying to type as fast as I can because my thoughts run a lot faster than I can type. If I had slowed down to think it through before I started using the "find and replace" tool, I'd have saved a lot of time and trouble. But then, slowing down to think and planning things out ahead are not my strong points, nor is patience for that matter. All this shows what tangled messes ADD can get us into, making things so much harder than they need to be. Slowing down, thinking ahead, and careful planning can save lots of trouble. Short cuts are not always time savers. When I worked on the cabinets, I was able to think ahead, plan and slow down. But it's clear that I still need to improve on this. What are you doing now? How do you try to enlist others' approval of you as a person? These will be the things you listed in Exercise 5.1, What Would the Sages Tell You to Do Differently? Aristotle would definitely not tell you to squander your happiness trying to get others' approval, because you would not be your best friend if you treated yourself like that. for Aristotle, the approval of others would not be the end goal. might suggest that you: Our founding fathers (and mothers) had no notion of an electrical world of machines, yet happiness was evidently quite attainable to them. However, today, upon permanently losing electricity, many of us would react as if it were the end of days. if people were able to find happiness throughout the entire history of the world up until 100 or so years ago, without these devices and machines, perhaps we can too. assertion is not to get rid of machines and electrical devices but to find happiness regardless of having them or not having them. assess the merits of your actions. ("It's irrational to go against my beliefs or better judgment, just to get others' approval.") Do good deeds because you believe them to be good. ("I'll do it, not to impress you, but because it's the right thing.") Accept the limitations on what is in your power to control.

("I can control my own emotions, but I can't control yours.") Respectfully but firmly decline to do what others can appropriately do for themselves. ("This is not part of my job description.") Avoid looking at the clock. Once you're in bed, don't worry about how long it might be taking to fall asleep. Resting of any kind is good. Make yourself comfortable. Keep your eyes closed. Focus on your breathing and relaxing your body. Don't force sleep. Let it come. In addition, a study by Baylor University found that writing out a list of things to be done the next day and developing even a simple plan for getting them done (even if that plan subsequently changed) allowed people to fall asleep significantly faster than simply journaling about the day's events or not writing at all. One of the main reasons anxious people report sleep problems is that ruminating about responsibilities often keeps them awake. Writing out a simple plan of attack can convince the brain that you're on top of things enough to let you get the rest you need to handle the next day. Maybe Hemingway or something from the movies. Well, I don't smoke, and I'm not Hemingway, and I couldn't find the Presidente. I looked in the liquor cabinet and didn't see it. I moved some bottles around, because sometimes I forget to look behind things, but it wasn't there. Then I found it. It was right there, on the front row, out in the open, in my face as a matter of fact. But it was turned around, so I was seeing the back of the bottle, where it had a very clear label, with Presidente in large red letters. I must have been looking for the front of the bottle, so I had looked right at it and never saw it.