Date Tags support

It acts behind the scenes, so, for example, if you feel discomfort with the temperature, you may put on a sweatshirt or strip down. Pleasure, pain, and distress are important aspects of the regulatory system as they motivate us to act in ways that support homeostasis and survival. The distress we feel may come softly, perhaps as a vague sense of unease, or loudly, in the form of anxiety, a panic attack, or depression. The point of distress is to mobilize you to take action to get out of your discomfort and back into balance. But his anger level registered somewhere around a 9--clearly a disconnect between the event and the emotional response, which indicates an iceberg had edged its chilly mass into the mix. Remember the examples at the beginning of this article? What happened in Robert's case was that he got a parking ticket. That's the basic fact. Did that warrant a blood-pressure-raising tantrum and a bruised toe from kicking a parking meter? Nalani learned her computer would take six days to fix. That's what happened. Does that jibe with a full-on meltdown and hyperventilating? You see where we're going with this. Obviously there is more going on than what we're seeing at face value, so we need to get to that stuff underneath to unhook ourselves. V) A group has within itself the adjustive capacities necessary to acquire a greater degree of internal harmony and productivity and to achieve a more effective adjustment to its environment. Provided certain conditions are met, the group will move in the direction of greater utilization of these capacities. This is a re-statement of the basic client-centered hypothesis as applied to a group rather than to an individual. Like that hypothesis about the individual, it stresses the positive growth forces which, if released, result in greater internal harmony and productive efficiency and more effective adjustment to the environment. It is an hypothesis that emphasizes the inner capacity of a group. It states that every group has this capacity, but implies that it is a matter of process or development for a group to approach the realization of that capacity.

In other words, a group may not be able to solve immediately an existing problem, yet it can and will develop in a direction which will lead to the best solution of that problem provided certain essential conditions are met. It will be apparent that, although expressed in the form of a proposition, this idea is more in the nature of an hypothesis which the group-centered leader chooses to hold in his relations with members of a group. He could choose to hold an entirely different belief about groups -- one that placed less stress upon the inner capacities of the group and more stress upon its inherent weaknesses and tendencies toward submission to outside forces. Such an hypothesis seems to be preferred by many writers, as is indicated in the following quotation from the writings of Freud: It may be hard to recognize anxiety, panic attacks, and depression as attempts at health and mobilization, but stay with me. My hope is to help you to see these as gifts and to support you in accepting and heeding them, so that in the long run, you will ultimately become happier, healthier, and more connected. Pain and distress may not be fun to experience, but as we accept them as part of our humanity, we can value and appreciate their role not just in our survival, but in making us better and more resilient people. The usefulness of pain can be difficult to come to grips with, especially when you are going through it. Yet painful experiences can be regarded as lessons that enable us to better handle similar occurrences in the future. They can also lead to greater capacity for compassion, love, empathy, and connection with others. We are wired for survival. That's why you feel hungry: to motivate you to eat and acquire the energy and nutrients you need. It's why food can taste good, to reward you for eating. It's why sex can be pleasurable, to motivate human connection and procreation. Start with what you know--the bold-faced facts of what happened--and try to isolate the thought that was running through your head in that moment. In Michael's case, his wife asked him to take out the trash, and that triggered the thought that this was a violation of lost time. Drill Down to Detect Icebergs Looking at the facts of what happened, why is that so upsetting to me? What does that (my answer to #1) mean to me? What is the worst part of that (my answer to #2) for me?

Assuming my answer to #3 is true, why is that so upsetting to me? Then, ask yourself the four questions below to drill down. Here's how that played out for Michael: Question #1: Looking at what happened, why is that so upsetting to me? A group is extraordinarily credulous and open to influence, it has no critical faculty, and the improbable does not exist for it. Inclined as it itself is to all extremes, a group can only be excited by an excessive stimulus. Anyone who wishes to produce an effect upon it needs no logical adjustment in his arguments; It respects force and can only be slightly influenced by kindness, which it regards merely as a form of weakness. It wants to be ruled and oppressed, and to fear its masters. And, finally, groups have never thirsted after truth. They demand illusions, and cannot do without them. They constantly give what is unreal precedence over what is real; They have an evident tendency not to distinguish between the two. A group is an obedient herd, which could never live without a master. Of course, these systems can get messed up because of difficult personal experiences and our cultural baggage around sex, food, and weight. Yet, healthy systems are wired into us, and we have the capacity to restore and heal those connections. The anatomy of the brain is most easily understood from the perspective of evolutionary history, using the triune brain model, which divides the brain into three regions representing the gradual acquisition of the brain structures through evolution. While this model is undoubtedly an oversimplification--in reality there is no such neat division--it provides a helpful overview of functioning. The three regions are as follows: These three sections of the brain are connected to each other and to the remainder of the body through neural pathways and hormones.

The most primitive part of the brain includes the main structures found in a reptile's brain: the brainstem and the cerebellum. This part of the brain controls the body's survival functions such as heart rate, breathing, body temperature, and digestion and is the main coordinator of the fight-or-flight survival response. The brainstem connects the brain to the rest of the body through the spinal cord. Its main job is to keep you safe. Answer: Because she interrupted my work on a crucial project for something trivial. Question #2: What does that (my answer to #1) mean to me? Answer: That my wife doesn't respect my work. Question #3: What is the worst part of that (my answer to #2) for me? Answer: That she doesn't respect me, because she knows how important my work is to me. Question #4: And why is that so upsetting to me? Answer: Because people should support and respect me at all times. There it was: People should support and respect me at all times. When we hit upon the word should, we know we're there. The trick is to keep drilling down until you get to that absolute, broad-based statement of belief. It has such a thirst for obedience that it submits instinctively to anyone who appoints himself as its master. It is true, perhaps, that history provides many examples of groups in which such characteristics have predominated, and this fact makes it understandable why some would choose to adopt this kind of hypothesis about groups. It is possible, however, to find in history examples of groups which have demonstrated quite different characteristics -- those which require us to have a great deal more respect for the inherent potentialities of the group for self-direction, self-protection, and appropriate adjustments. It is just such a respect that seems a part of the attitudes of those who have chosen to operate with groups in terms of the hypothesis that is contained in Proposition V. While recognizing that groups have both the tendencies described by Freud and also more positive tendencies, some leaders choose to hypothesize that the latter are the stronger. This proposition is explicit in its emphasis upon movement, growth, or development of the group.

This is to say that the group's achievement of a state in which it is able to utilize its maximum potential is the result of a certain process of development. Groups usually do not have this characteristic. Quite the contrary, most groups operate far from this ideal. Apparently few groups in our culture are ever provided with the conditions whereby they might move toward maximum utilization of their potential. The limbic area, which sits atop the reptilian brain, is composed of the hippocampus, amygdala, thalamus, and hypothalamus. Referred to as the emotional brain, the limbic area plays a role in how we feel, remember things, and interact with others. Its main job is to keep you connected to others. The cortex, the last primary structure to evolve, is often referred to as the thinking brain. It's involved in language, rational and abstract thought, imagination, and creativity, to name just a few functions. Its main question is What can I learn? Of special interest is the prefrontal cortex, which connects to both the emotional and instinctual areas of your brain. A well-developed and well-connected prefrontal cortex is critical to making good decisions and managing emotions and bodily functions. It's what allows you to pause, consider the emotional and bodily messages you are getting from the limbic system and brainstem, obtain insight into what's going on, and have empathy for others. It regulates impulsive desire, helps you do the right thing, and controls the reactive impulses that may solve a problem temporarily (saying Shut up when someone is driving you nuts) but create long-term consequences in the end (goodbye, friendship). Notice that now we understand where Michael's big, emotional response came from. A loss of five minutes can't explain anger at a level 9, but having your life partner violate one of your fundamental rules of life (as Michael saw it) does account for a 9 outburst. By the way, the Michael in this story is Andrew. This is an actual event from his life that happened long ago and was the catalyst for much of his work on iceberg beliefs that you're learning today, including his surefire method of navigating around our icebergs once we uncover them. Now, let's learn how to get around those troublesome icebergs. There are three ways to deal with an iceberg belief: embrace it, melt it, or steer around it.