When we open up to one another we inevitably realise that we share the same human feelings: hurts and doubts, hurries and worries. The same dark nights and desires of the soul. And while each one of us is unique, we share our essential humankind-ness. Our need to belong, our need to love and feel loved. When we practise kindness, respect and care for ourselves and each other at all times, including in the midst of our challenges, we find precious peace and inspiration. We connect meaningfully, not only with ourselves but with others who will love and support us, allowing us to feel the soothing care and understanding we seek during harder times. When we're happy, we glow with the richness of all that we have been, all that we are, and all that we can be. By welcoming all parts of ourselves and our stories back home with love each day, we may learn, grow and sparkle on. In 1975, the psychologist Howard Gardner published a book entitled The Shattered Mind, a scientific exploration that refers to "multiple intelligences." Gardner was among the first to note a true dichotomy between intellectual intelligence and the ways in which human emotion guides and governs behavior (Gardner). A decade later, in 1985, psychology student Wayne Payne coined the phrase emotional intelligence in his doctoral dissertation, using it to discuss the intelligence of emotions, self-integration, inherent emotional states, and emotional theory. Payne's term has since ignited academic interest and a slew of research and theory building, guiding psychology into the study of emotions and their impact on human behavior (Payne). In 1987, acclaimed researcher Keith Beasley published an article in Mensa Magazine in which the term emotional quotient was used, intending it to serve as a complement of sorts to the more widely understood intelligence quotient (IQ). While not easily amenable to objective evaluation, Beasley highlighted the idea that assessing emotional aptitude is just as important as intellectual ability (Beasley). Three years later in 1990, psychologists Peter Salovey and John Mayer brought attention to the concept of emotional intelligence on a large scale. Their groundbreaking article, "Emotional Intelligence," presented a full-bodied theory regarding the ability to learn, grow, and develop based on emotional acuity. Due to the success of the idea, emotional intelligence has grown rapidly, resulting in successful research and empirical studies by social scientists all over the world (Salovey & Mayer). It's always the same. And it's not useful. The same is true for quitting a job you hate. The pro is that you're free from a bad job.

The con is that there's a lot of uncertainty. It's time to break free from this conventional thinking. Instead of binary thinking, start thinking more abundantly. It's not this or that in life. You can have this and that. I always thought I had to either quit my business or take a job. Also, many of my friends think you should quit your job to start a business. Who ever said these things? We always limit ourselves by narrow and conventional thinking. We always want to stay within a box. That's because we never take a step back to look at the larger picture. Take a look at the drawing below. If you're standing inside the maze, you'll probably start walking towards the middle, right? That's what you should do when you're in a maze. However, this maze is different. The prize is not in the middle, it's outside the maze. But you can only see the goal if you take a helicopter view. It's impossible to see the goal from within the maze. And yet, that's how most of us live. We do things conventionally because that's "how it's done." When you stop doing things the way they're done, you'll start doing things how you get it done.

Obsessive-compulsive disorder reflects a compulsive need to do certain things in an attempt to control anxiety. If you have OCD, you may, for example, consistently need to make lists for everything, have repetitive rituals that you're compelled to do, struggle with being flexible, count objects around you obsessively, or have to have your surroundings so scrupulously clean that you're up at 2:00 a.m. mopping the kitchen floor. Brittany, who strongly identified with perfectly hidden depression but also had some OCD traits, felt compelled to keep a highly detailed One of the chief characteristics of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a life ruled by intense, impulsive, and unstable emotions. Those who have BPD have lives filled with emotional chaos, lots of dramatic ups and downs, self-destructive tendencies, suicide attempts, and an immense fear of abandonment. Nonsense. If you buy into this stuff, if you choose to internalize events and behaviors that you do not control, then you're setting yourself up for years of depression and needless pain. And when you think about this kind of reaction, there can actually be a streak of arrogance in it, some egotism: It's as if you're saying the sun can't rise without your permission, that the planets orbit at your command. I mean, let's be rational here. There are things you can control and things you can't. Don't lay claim to things you don't own. To do so is to put your self-concept in the crosshairs of undue criticism and therefore subject it to taking a beating in the confidence department. Give yourself a reality break here; there are enough things for which you are clearly and undeniably responsible without your taking on things over which you have no control. What about the externalizers? Can their locus of control create problems for them? Clearly, yes. Negative external attribution can be extremely destructive. For example, a binge-spending externalizer, on the verge of financial collapse, might say, "I guess that God just wants me to go bankrupt. It's God's will." Imagine the consequences that flow from that kind of thinking. If you were an externalizer and one of your parents died, you might perceive that some major force was responsible.

You would probably become angry at that outside force and rage at its injustice. You might say, "Why does God despise me? He has punished me in the worst way. I can't imagine what I've done to deserve this pain." Inappropriate blame never addresses the heart of the problem. If you misdiagnose a situation, you will also mistreat that situation and fail to do what is actually and realistically called for. Again, the challenge is to be rational and genuine with regard to what your self is telling you. The authentic self is based in accurate knowledge of who and what you are and are capable of controlling. It is the fictional self that is grounded in guilt, manipulation, and expectancies that will mislead you. The biggest step and one we will soon be working on is beginning to listen to what you are telling yourself and evaluating the lens through which you are viewing the world. Remember, to be authentic in your thinking you must deal with facts and only the facts. A self-concept that is distorted with an inappropriately external locus of control will be compromised dramatically. The fast pace of this busy world can leave us breathless. Endless to-do lists and busy schedules tire and deplete us. We truly need rest but can't make time to be quiet! In the quiet moments we do have, we feel restless, distracted and overwhelmed. Despite promises made to us about shiny objects, bright and new, our things' do not make us happy in the lasting, fulfilling ways we wish they would. <a href='http://seotipster.parsiblog.com/Posts/33/Create+Data-Heavy+Content+to+Build+Whitehat+Backlinks/'>We</a> can see that clutter, comparison and competition have been obstructing our joy. <a href='http://frugalnuts.fourfour.com/news/post/advanced-on-page-seo-principles'>It's</a> time for change now and we can feel it! <a href='http://sansara12.freeasphost.net/level3/index.html'>In</a> the words of Albert Einstein,The world will not evolve past its current state of crisis by using the same thinking that created the situation.' Indeed, we must think and see anew. On a magical note, the current, collective awakening of which we are all a part is edging us closer to a revolution of spirit.

We are awakening to the realisation that old `civilised' systems we once accepted as normal and natural are no longer working for us or making us happy: systems concerning class and social status, beliefs around productivity and wealth accumulation, ideas about using our earth and her natural resources. More and more people are understanding the value of kindness, compassion and unity. More people are understanding that we need to care for our environment and are making daily effort to do so in simple but powerful ways, from riding a bike and recycling to avoiding plastics, composting and eating compassionately. More people are finding and choosing natural alternatives in the way of nutrition, home and body care. We are part of this healing revolution, by choosing to be proactive, live lovingly and see through open eyes. As the research in the area of emotional intelligence has grown, so has the number of theories, leading to a well-developed web of study focused on how to best harness innate and learned emotional skills to better relate to and interact with others. Today, multiple models exist that attempt to highlight, explain, and promote the effectiveness of emotional intelligence as an area of scientific practice and study. Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify, manage, and harness emotions in order to achieve desired outcomes. Rather than theorize, let's discuss two examples that illustrate emotional intelligence at work. Psychologist and emotional intelligence expert Daniel Goleman likes to tell an anecdote about a flight attendant on a blustery Super Bowl Sunday. The flight in question had been delayed several hours, and the weary travelers were eager to get home, see their families, and catch the end of the big game. The stewardess encountered several individuals who refused to be seated while taxiing to the gate after the plane touched down. However, rather than reprimanding the passengers for standing, she cracked a joke about staying seated. As a result, instead of feeling scolded or demeaned, the standing passengers laughed and returned to their seats (Goleman 2000). The point is that not striving for perfection becomes a habit. Don't worry about being a perfectionist--there's no such thing. More often than not, people are the opposite. Perfectionism is merely an excuse. In reality, we're scared of what people think of our work. Either way, there's no point in asking "why" when you deal with obstacles, challenges, or mistakes.