Add your score on statements with even numbers: 2, 4, 6, 8 and 10 Then add odd-numbered items 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9 and subtract that total from 24. Add the two steps together and divide by 8. Touch helps babies cope with stress. In infancy, touch is the first sense that an infant responds to. Notably the workplace, touch is among effective means of communication, but it is necessary to adhere to conventional rules of etiquette. For instance, a handshake is a form of touch that is used in the professional environment and can convey the relationship between two people. Pay attention to the nonverbal cues that you are sending next time you shake someone's hand. Overall, one should always convey confidence when shaking another person's hand, but you should avoid being overly confident. Praise and encouragement are communicated by a pat on the back of a hand on the shoulder. One should recall that not all people share the same comfort levels when using touch as nonverbal communication. For instance, an innocent touch can make another person feel uneasy, and for this reason, applying touch requires reading the body language and responding accordingly. Most forms of communication require some kind of touch. For example, if every day you walk into the house and just put your sunglasses any old place, it's little wonder that you can't find them when you next want them. Designate a spot (dining room table, kitchen counter, and so on) for your sunglasses and every day lay them there. Make it part of your coming home routine: Come into the house, take off your coat, hang up your coat, and put your sunglasses in their proper place (this is good for keys, too). Eventually it becomes ingrained in your memory as part of a routine. Exercise: Taking Inventory How many times do you walk around your house trying to remember where you put things? The solution: Put each item back in its proper place.

By doing this you will stop asking yourself, Where are my glasses? What did I do with my keys? Many absentminded people run into trouble remembering occasional tasks or activities. Alternatively, if you'd like the score calculated for you, use the facility on this site: https://angeladuckworth. Source: Angela Lee Duckworth25 If you want to know how you measure up compared to the general population, the closer to 2. How did you get on? If you got a low score, remember to view it with a growth rather than a fixed mindset because, whatever your score, grit can be built using some of the tools in this and subsequent articles. How do I know that grit can be built? I first did this test when Martin Seligman (from article 4) published his article Flourish in 2011 when Angela Lee Duckworth was part of his graduate programme at the University of Pennsylvania and just beginning to publish papers on grit. While I had completed my Masters in Organisational Behaviour the previous year, I was still new to positive psychology and had only just started to use some of its tools myself. This was reflected in my score: 3. In May 2016, I was prompted to return to the score by Angela Lee Duckworth's new article titled, appropriately enough, Grit. A handshake is a primary touch in social touches. Handshakes vary from culture to culture. It is socially polite and allowed one to shake another person's hand during an introduction in the United States. In some countries, kissing on the cheek is the norm. In the same interactions, men will allow a male stranger to touch them on their shoulders and arms, whereas women feel comfortable being touched by a female stranger only on the arms. Men are likely to enjoy touch from a female stranger while women tend to feel uncomfortable with any touch by a male stranger. Equally important, men and women process touch differently, which can create confusing and awkward situations.

In most contexts, it might help unnecessary physical contact in social contexts, especially those of the opposite sex. One should try to follow societal norms and to take cues from those around you. For instance, while you stand close to a stranger on an elevator, it is not acceptable to engage in any unnecessary physical contact with him or her. For example, every second Monday you're supposed to go to the library and volunteer. More often than not, however, the second Monday finds you and the library miles apart. Or, you walk into the house carrying a bill from the mail that is due in a week. You put it aside, telling yourself you'll pay it later, and the next thing you know, you've gotten another bill for the same thing, this time with a late fee on it. Here are a few tips to remember occasional tasks: Reminder notes. If you know on Monday that you have to pay your quarterly taxes on Friday, write it down on a piece of paper and hang it in a place where you will see it, such as the refrigerator or bathroom mirror. Make a general things-to-do list. Devise headings for each day, and write down everything that needs to be done under the appropriate category. After you complete each task, cross it off the list. My score the second time around, five years on? This growth reflected a period in which I had used the tools of positive psychology to build my persistence muscles, particularly in growing my consulting business and selling. When you completed the score, you will have noticed the general thrust of the questions. Look at each one again and write in your journal examples of where you have shown grit and also where you haven't. Passion and persistence Angela Lee Duckworth tells us that passion and persistence are the two components of grit. The Grit scale actually breaks down to give us a score for each of these.

The odd-numbered questions are to do with passion. Add up your total scores, divide by 5 and then subtract this number from 24. This is your passion score. Additionally, at the workplace, touch can become complicated when touch is between a boss and a subordinate. Standard practice is that those in power are not allowed to touch subordinates than the other way around. For this reason, you should examine your motives for even the most trivial of touches and resolve to enhance your communication techniques with your juniors. A standard measure is that it is better to fall but on the side of caution. Functional touch includes being physically examined by a doctor and being touch as a form of professional massage. Notably, the types of touches allowed between friends vary depending on contexts. For instance, women are more receptive, touching female friends compared to their male counterparts. The touches between female friends are more affectionate often in the form of a hug, whereas men prefer to shake hands and pat each other on the back. Within family members, women touch each other compared to men. Additionally, same-sex family members are more likely to touch than family members of the opposite sex are. Use visualization. For instance, say you must be at the library every other Friday to help Mrs. Henderson, the librarian. To remember your appointment, visualize Mrs. Henderson somewhere that constantly reminds you of her. For example, if every night you use the microwave to cook dinner, picture Mrs. Henderson's face inside your microwave every time you open the door.

Each time you prepare dinner there's Mrs. Henderson, frowning furiously at you, with a pencil behind her ear, sitting in the middle of your dinner. Visualization, exaggeration, and humor tools also help you cure your absentmindedness in other ways. The even numbers are to do with persistence. Add up your total scores and divide by 5. This is your persistence score. What if my passion score is low? Didn't I say earlier that it doesn't help to inflame passion artificially and that you should let it build over time? Didn't I also say that passion can get in the way? If your score is very low on passion, it may be that you are spreading yourself too thinly across a number of pursuits. If, in addition to the outcome goal that you have established, you are also learning Italian, attending salsa lessons, doing an oil-painting class and taking piano lessons, it's just possible that your passion lacks focus, something to which we will return in article 8. One quality that you will need to bring to your pursuit of your outcome goal is focus. This will sadly mean giving some things up. Displays of affection between friends are critical in expressing support and encouragement, even if you are not a touchy person. One should be willing to get out of their comfort zone and offer their friend a hug when he or she is going through a difficult time. Helping others enliven their moods is likely to uplift your moods as well. Commonly, arousing touches are elicited intense feelings and are only suitable when mutually agreed upon. Arousal touches are meant to evoke happiness and pleasure and can involve kissing, hugging, and flirtatious touching that is intentional to suggest sex. One should be careful about their partner's needs. One can greatly improve their communication skills and relationships by paying attention to the nonverbal cues that you send to others via touching behavior.