Ensure it is at a time when it is unlikely to be trumped by other activities. Set a reminder on your phone. It can take a while to figure out how to get control over your emotions. There are many adults out there in the world who are still trying! So don't give up if it doesn't happen quickly enough.My God: How do you thank the one who created you, led you on a journey to know him and then opened your eyes to the greatest love story your heart could desire? There are no words that you haven't already given me, there are no ways to show you that you don't already know. Yet I humbly say thank you for your gift of love and relationship that has changed me from the inside out. I am nothing without you and all I do, I want to be for you. You are my eternal love. May I live completely for you! My Family: First of all, thank you to my sweet husband who selflessly gives to our family. You always put us first in that quiet, behind the scenes way. Marie's list of strengths included makes friends easily, caring and helpful, former hairdresser, and good at sales. Her list of the things she liked included helping others, loves dogs, enjoys talking with people, and likes to be busy. There were other things on her list, but these were the items that came together for her when she was trying to figure out what to do with her life. She had just gotten divorced, and after being out of the workforce for over a decade raising her kids, she needed to find a job. She spent several months feeling depressed and lost. She didn't want to go back to being a beautician--too many hassles working with people who were touchy about how they looked. After making her list, Marie realized that her love of dogs and enjoyment of cutting hair could cross paths. She went to dog grooming school and is now delighted with her new job working with dogs and talking with their owners in a small dog grooming salon just down the block from her own home.

Give Yourself Credit It also helps your self-confidence to tell others about your successes and what feels good about your accomplishments. Another unfortunate result of spending so much time on social media is that we are starting to equate ourselves with others and our lives. How much have you seen your friend's beautiful holiday photos and wished you could do that too? Or did they see pictures of them and their partner looking so happy together and wanting to be in a relationship as well? It affects our self-esteem when we start to think that other people have better lives and make us feel like we're not good enough because we do not have all those nice things. The Internet and being online is not always bad, of course. At our fingertips, we have a great resource that enables us to contact our loved ones, get information, and reach out for assistance when we need it. Introverted and nervous people in other people's presence can be part of their home safety groups. People who are home-bound can shop for something without going out, from groceries and clothing to medications. Moderating how much time is spent online is the secret to avoiding the harmful effects of the Internet. Our growing reliance on the Internet has changed the way we interact with others drastically. I'm not fond of speaking to groups during lunch or after dinner, because it can sometimes be tough to keep their attention. But I got up and began my speech. I had been caught a bit off guard but soon began to settle down into my material. Lunch continued, and the waiter reappeared and started to serve the main entree--and walked right in front of me as he did so. My audience's attention was now consumed with the thought of their chicken parmesan. At this point, I was frustrated and felt like I was the background music at an upscale restaurant. A part of me wanted to walk out, but I knew if I walked out or stopped to ask, Are you listening? That's when I decided I was going to get through the speech, no matter what, and focus my attention on the people listening to me.

I discovered that when your audience upsets you, they control you. Speakers must remember their commitment to an audience, even if the audience didn't make a commitment to listen. This is not to be diminishing, but comforting. Whatever obstacles you are facing in your life, it is not something that has not been experienced before by many other people. If they can navigate through it, you can as well. A stoic knows when they need to make tough decisions and how to make the right one. They make them using their mind as opposed to their heart. Sometimes, when our decisions come from our heart, we can behave illogically. We will do things that are not good for us because of something we feel an attachment to. A common example of this is when people insist on holding onto a relationship that is not good for them. They are not truly compatible and they cannot figure out a way to communicate in a healthy fashion. They might have even broken up before. Worked outside in the garden for a few hours when we got home and felt better. 2:00 pm: Late lunch--a carrot, some leftover lamb from dinner last night, and half of a small sliced tomato from the garden. I was aware of having to really chew the carrot, so that slowed me down, and I paid attention while I was chewing the lamb as well. I usually eat way faster than my husband and I kept pace with him for a change, which felt good, as did the meal. 4:30 pm: A glass of water. Trying to stave off rising hungry feelings and make it until dinner without eating . 5:40 pm: Hungry! A bit edgy;

5:45 pm: Couldn't stand it--had a small dried fig and a few almonds--felt immediately better. 6:30 pm: Sat down for dinner--ate a grilled chicken thigh, a mini baked sweet potato from our garden (the first of the year and the first I've ever grown--it was delicious! Everyone Freaks Out I once saw a brochure from one of our great national parks that said: If you should find yourself in the jaws of a Grizzly Bear, remain calm. It can make the difference between your being badly mauled and losing your life. I knew immediately that this how-to tip wouldn't help me. I'm definitely not one to stay calm in such a situation, although I do take comfort in the notion that should I find myself in this very dilemma, I might be frozen stiff with terror. The bear, perhaps not being all that bright, might then think me calm or dead, or whatever it takes for a grizzly bear to suddenly lose interest, drop its dinner to the ground, and go off looking for new prey. Nothing is more important than calming down, but it's not always possible. While we're on the subject of wildlife, here's another story that illustrates this point. Some years back I went to a two-week spiritual retreat in Arizona led by Carolyn Conger, a psychologist and one of the wisest people I've ever met. The experience included a solo retreat into the desert, where we would spend two days fasting and practicing total silence. This is a meeting with yourself that is non-negotiable. In much the same way that you would commit to a work meeting, a medical appointment or seeing a friend, the same rules apply. I will sit down on [insert date] at [insert time] at [insert location] to plan and set out my 5 senses plan. Getting started: setting a 5-sense agenda for the day and taking your temperature Each day: morning Look at your goals each day. Stick them down where you can see them, read them as soon as you get out of bed, over your morning coffee or on your commute, and think about how you might be challenged that day to put them into practice. Record your wellbeing temperature at the start of the day for each goal, in anticipation of the obstacles to come.

Jot down any thoughts you have within your notes section. Each day: evening Yet I think you are all the more heroic for it. Years have passed and we are a little older, wiser and hopefully more dedicated to God and one another. I love you and never want a day to go by without saying it! I can't wait to continue this adventure of life together that God has given us. And to the rest of my boy crew, I know this has been a work for all of us. Hours spent typing away on the keyboard, late nights, early mornings, weekends and sorry Mom is writing her article right now. Thank you for your patience, kindness and love. Someday, I hope you will look back and think- if Mom can follow God to do hard things, I can to. My Circle: So many sweet friends and clients were willing to be open, honest and vulnerable to share their stories in these articles. Others gave of their time and energy to read, edit, give feedback and cheer me on from the sidelines. This gives you the opportunity to receive encouragement and support. Reciting the incident and how you handled it also helps you anchor it in your memory. Instead of mulling over past upsetting events with the narcissist, take time to deliberate on your successes, your courage, and your perseverance. Keeping track of your past and present accomplishments helps you feel braver and stronger and gives you more self-assurance for the next new encounter. People who have caretaker tendencies often find it uncomfortable to share their successes with others, despite the benefits, because they believe they're bragging or begging for attention, just like the narcissist. However, the narcissist never feels shy about sharing his successes--so this is quite different. You deserve to get credit and support from others, and it helps balance all the support, encouragement, and optimism you give to them. Give Yourself Encouragement