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Instead I am overcome with too much feeling, awash with a vague, gnawing sorrow. I weep and writhe under its weight, and then in a more terrifying turn, I feel so much that I feel nothing at all. I am still and numb. I would welcome sadness, for then I would know I am still alive. As it is, I am the walking dead. Medical professionals, however, don't work in word pictures. They distill depression into a list of symptoms, as stated in the official diagnostic manual, the DSM-5: To be diagnosed with depression, a person must have at least five of these symptoms for a two-week period, and at least one of them must be either a depressed mood or the loss of interest and pleasure in activities they once enjoyed. Symptoms must also cause distress and interfere with a person's ability to function in work or social settings. Metabolic fitness can be divided into aerobic (with oxygen) and anaerobic (without oxygen). Both cause the heart rate to increase but have a very different role in maintaining health. Exercise creates a physical stress that creates more demands on your body for oxygen, blood flow, and nutrients, and requires more energy production from your muscles to sustain activity. Increased activity creates a greater demand for oxygen. When we exercise, our cells use a form of energy called ATP (adenosine triphosphate). During exercise, our bodies use glucose (sugar) and fat to make this energy so we can keep going. We metabolize sugar or fat based on whether oxygen is present in our system or not. At the beginning of an exercise session, we are primarily doing aerobic fitness because we have adequate oxygen to perform the required tasks at the beginning of our routines. Our heart rates increase to bring oxygenated blood to the muscles we are using. With oxygen, our bodies break down fat to make ATP so that our bodies can work more effectively. Your relationship with other people is healthy and you enjoy the company of others without overly depending on others for your happiness.

Growing up, kids and teens that grow in environments that support their self-esteem tend to have a fuller and more enjoyable life. It is easier for them to blend with their peers and relate well with adults. Self-esteem gives you the drive to stay true to a task until success is accomplished. Giving up easily is not a trait associated with healthy self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem gives you the power to believe firmly in yourself. Self-doubt and healthy self-esteem do not coexist in the same individual. And even when the individual knows they have a particular weakness it does not affect their overall self-confidence. Healthy self-esteem gives you the courage to want to attempt new things even if you don't know how. Your apparent lack of knowledge about a thing does not make you doubt your abilities, instead, they inspire you to want to know and try things out. Though the anguish depression causes may make this way of defining it feel cold, specific definitions do, at least, remind us that depression is a real illness. It has symptoms and diagnostic criteria, and it requires the intervention of medical and mental health professionals. It may require medication and therapy. It can be deadly. It is not just in your head. It is not something we can defeat by forcing mind over matter. It's something to be taken seriously. THE MANY FACES OF DEPRESSION Reading through symptoms like a checklist blurs the reality that depression wears many faces. It is the student who cuts class to lay uncaring in a dark room, her mind too muddled to listen to a lecture, her heart too overwhelmed to produce speech for one more human being. Although glucose is also being used in aerobic exercise, the primary source of energy is fat.

For this reason, people often call aerobic fitness the fat-burn stage of exercise. As we do more endurance work, our muscles demand oxygen and nutrients and run out of oxygen. We breathe faster to bring in more oxygen, and our heart rates go up to get the oxygen to the muscles that need it. Over time, however, we cannot get enough oxygen to the muscles that require it. Our muscle cells then shift to working without oxygen (anaerobic metabolism). Without oxygen, the body does not break down fat. It transitions to using glucose as the primary source of fuel for energy. When we use glucose without oxygen, lactic acid is the by-product. Lactic acid in our muscles is what makes them ache after a good workout. Handling disappointments and dealing with mistakes is a lot easier for those who have a great sense of self-esteem. There is a clear understanding that things may not work out fine all of the time, so acceptance of situations and moving past them becomes easier. It helps you to confidently make healthy choices that have positive effects on your health, body, mind, career, relationships, and every other aspect of your life. Taking the Right Steps to Loving Yourself The whole idea is that you must M be ready to take your life back and love yourself. There are many different steps that you can take to build your self-esteem and if you follow all of them, you will see changes really soon. It will not happen overnight, but you will begin to see life in a whole new way. Once you have decided to make the decision to love yourself again, you will be well on your way to a brand new you filled with love and positivity. The first step in building your self-esteem is figuring out what initially caused this change in you. Have you always had self-esteem issues? It is the bereaved father whose grief erodes his ability to think, to live, to rest, to heal.

Whose body aches with the act of breathing. Who cannot summon energy to return to work--or even to rise from bed. The father whose grief is leading him nowhere but deeper into an irreparable pit of despair. It is the young professional who continues to push through apathy and sleepless nights. The one who goes through the motions of dress, of food, of meetings, of sitting in the chair, but whose life is drained of all vigor. It is the man devoid of hope who is standing on a bridge, a note at home for his wife, every cell aching for an end to the pain. Depression morphs and shifts around the criteria we use to diagnose it. It can come from an accumulation of painful circumstances. It can come without warning. To help clear away the lactic acid, we activate our sympathetic nervous system (our fight-or-flight response) with the neurotransmitter norepinephrine (also called adrenaline). This allows our heart rate and blood pressure to further elevate and help bring more oxygen supply to our muscles. This process of activating the nervous system is a form of stress. Exercise, though, is initially eustress because the increases in heart rate and blood pressure allow our oxygen supply to keep up with demand. The increase in heart rate also helps bring more oxygen to the tired muscles and aid in removing lactic acid. If we continue exercising, we accumulate even more lactic acid and speed up our heart rate even more. Eventually, based on our fitness levels, the muscles fatigue and we stop exercising. Exercising beyond our fitness level can become a distress. We can become unbalanced and overwork our sympathetic nervous system. There is more adrenaline and the heart rate stays higher. Is a new development?

Has there been something bad that happened to you that you are just now realizing? If you begin to remember childhood events or moments from your past that was traumatic, this could be the entire reason that you have these self-esteem problems. Once you have found out the reason for your poor self-esteem, it is time to take it into your own hands. Remember that when you start to raise your self-esteem, remember that you cannot fix the things you cannot change. You don't want to make Those who are closest to you love you for a reason, if you change your entire persona, they won't even recognize you anymore. Just remember that you don't have to make all of the changes all at once. It is important to take your time with these changes. You cannot rush making yourself happier and loving yourself. Some of us continue to get out of bed and attend school or work. Others lay immobile in the dark. Physical symptoms overwhelm some of us more than others, especially in cultures particularly laden with stigma. It differs in severity and in the length of time it takes up its chilling residence in our bones. The people you will meet in these articles reflect this complex variation. Some continued haltingly with their work while others were incapacitated. Some experienced other physical illnesses or symptoms along with their psychological ones. Some seemed to have a family proclivity to depression, suggesting a genetic component. For some, depression was sparked by trauma, loneliness, and difficulty. Others found that it took hold with little warning. Over time, this can cause injury and symptoms of overtraining, which can tax our immune systems.