Purposefully focus your intentions for all that makes your life happy and abundant! Sir William Osler, the immensely influential North American physician of the early twentieth century, wrote clinical aphorisms which are still quoted with approval by teachers of medicine. Although this tradition has thinned out in the second half of this century, there are still exceptional examples of epistles to the neophyte practitioner, gleanings of careers devoted to humane practice (see, for instance, Lipkin 1974; Cassell 1976; Leigh and Reiser 1980; Reiser and Rosen 1984). But within the profession, this genre of writing has increasingly been labeled the art of medicine, a term of ambivalence and even disparagement in a profession for which the preferred self-image is decidedly that of science. I offer this article from a different perspective but with a similar objective of encouraging humane care. The first two articles of this article lay out a theory of the experience of illness based on my analysis of the meanings of illness narratives. Now I wish to return to the matters discussed in those articles to develop a rationale for a practical clinical methodology in the care of the chronically ill. The essence of that methodology is captured by the words empathic listening, translation, and interpretation, which I take to be the craft of the clinician who treats illness, not just disease. When flashbacks occur, you can feel helpless. When switching happens, you might blame yourself for triggering your partner when in fact it may have nothing to do with you. You may blame yourself for her mood swings, internalizing the rage as opposed to placing it where it belongs, in the past. You may feel a need to save her even though you know you cannot. It is important to remember that you did not cause the DID and you can not make it go away. Loving your partner is the best thing you can do. Rescuing her is only hurtful to both of you in the long run. Seriously consider joining a support group for partners or getting involved in an on-line chat room. Taking care of yourself will actually help your partner feel relieved that she does not have to take care of you, too.

It also tells her you are interested in dealing with the dissociation. Activate Your Intentions When you have a vision for yourself that excites you, you can feel the surge of happy and eager energy that comes with that. Similarly, when you allow yourself to sustain your focus on thoughts that anger you, you can feel the energy surge of revenge, resentment, or frustration that comes with that focus. When enough similar-feeling waves mass together and get in sync with one another (whether they be happy and eager or bitter and frustrating), they are poised for a surge, a boost, a spike of power that activates that energy into quantum communication with similar-frequency energy waves. It is that syncing and spiking of multiple waves of similar energy that activates your personal power. As you recall times in your life when you were happy and eager to start each new day, you felt purposeful, focused, and motivated to reach something that you really wanted. You sustained your focus on your desires, your energy waves started syncing with each other, and then your feelings of conviction, decision, clarity, eagerness, and excitement gave those energy waves a boost. That boost was the energy needed to activate quantum communication with your waves seeking connection with similar waves outside your body. The energy strands that you set into motion with your purposeful, focused feelings are imprinted with the intentions that activated them. That imprint carries indefinitely. The problems for the practitioner are abundantly illustrated in the preceding articles. Several cautions are in order. This clinical methodology is meant to complement and balance, not replace, the standard biomedical approach to the treatment of disease processes. There can be no such thing, as I hope I have already made clear. Rather, this is a framework for assuring that the uniqueness of illness as human experience, in all its many social and personal manifestations, becomes the center of the healer's gaze. John Hewitt (from Heaney 1980, 210) captured the healer's experience: Hand over hand eagerly I crawl Uncertainty must be as central to the experience of the practitioner as it is to the patient. Attempts to formulate complete psychosocial systems of care that claim to answer wholesale each and every one of the serious dilemmas faced by patients, families, and clinicians (and in a standardized manner, yet!

It is no wonder physicians are wary of such systems, be they psychoanalytic, behavioral, or other. Pretending that the issue does not exist or that all your relationship problems are a result of your partner's DID will merely increase her shame. The most difficult situation by far is how to maintain equality in a relationship where one of the partners is often in crisis. It can be helpful to start with the assumption that we are all dependent on each other to some degree. The goal, then, is to strive for healthy dependency. You might think about some of the ways that loving partners are dependent on each other: Start by brainstorming times that each of you might be dependent on the other, then discuss how you might meet those dependency needs in a healthy way.Meditation Is Like W Meditations is like water and meditation with water can help to purify your spirit. It cleanses you, refreshes you, every time your soul is near and true! Richard Wagner puts it simply like this: Joy is not in things; The energy you activate becomes a continuous broadcast seeking connection with like energy. What do you want that imprint to be? What energy do you want to continue to experience in your life? Those purposeful choices for your focus impact not only you but those around you. Purposefully activating energy in keeping with your specific desires is using the quantum power of your emotions. This power comes hand in hand with being present to your inner guidance for connecting you with the fulfillment of your desires. Remember that your personal intuitive guidance system talks to you in the same language you use to talk to it: that is, through emotions. You activate the quantum energy of your emotions through a boost in your feelings, a boost such as eagerness, excitement, conviction, determination, or passion. Similarly, you receive guidance through a boost in your feelings such as a spark of inspiration, a gut reaction, inner wisdom, excitement, creativity, peace, understanding, compassion, or a spike of energy that comes with clearly knowing what is true for yourself.

The energy of emotion that you have purposefully activated sends forth electromagnetic quantum waves of energy outside your body that are seeking connection with similar-frequency waves. Human sciences applied to sick persons must respect this innate uncertainty; Nonetheless, it is possible to craft a clinical method that is neither reductionistic nor mechanistic. Unlike care of the acutely ill, moreover, such a method need not be so seriously hedged in by the constraints of time that it is unlikely to be practicable. The practitioner and his chronically ill patients interact over many occasions, often over long blocks of time. There is time enough to carry out a variety of clinical tasks. If not this week, then next week or next month, the various components of the method outlined below can be fitted into the routine of care--as long as the physician stays with the patient (physically and existentially) over the long course. Patients and family members might compare these suggested strategies with those actually used by their caregivers. Practitioners, in turn, can compare them with the methods to which they have grown accustomed. I hope that such comparisons will lead to fruitful discussions of a collaborative kind; One objective of this clinical methodology is to encourage patient (family)-doctor relationships that are in fact collaborations. Meditation Is Like X Mediation XVII helps you realize that you are neither a hopeless island nor part of the hopeful earth because let me tell you it does not really matter where you live because hope does not really exist. Lu Xun expresses the XVII of Meditation like this: Hope cannot be said to exist, nor can it be said not to exist. It is just like roads across the earth. For actually the earth had no roads to begin with, but when many men pass one way, a road is made. Meditation Is Like Y Meditation is like Y because meditation of your heart is really an exploration of your soul. Without it, you're helpless to go wherever the wind may blow.

Yehoshua puts this idea like this: When they find a chance connection with similar-frequency waves, those waves need to be similar enough and sustained enough for the high parts and low parts to get in sync with each other. When that happens, they are then communicating and moving together as one unit in harmony. The resonance of that communication is your own personal guidance system. This guidance system allows you to know which opportunities available to you in this large field of possibilities will bring you your desires. Remember that you are living in a field of energy shared by many people. Other people also have wishes and desires, with energy waves seeking connection. Energy waves connect by chance. Not all of those chance connections will be helpful for you. You need to discern which of them are best for you to follow. You have this discerning power naturally built into you. We must begin with the premise that chronic disease by definition cannot be cured, that indeed the quest for cure is a dangerous myth that serves patient and practitioner poorly. It distracts their attention from step-by-step behaviors that lessen suffering, even if they do not magically heal the disease. Patient and practitioner both need to accept that the primary goal of treatment is the reduction of disablement in the ongoing experience of an illness. To the extent possible, the goal should be to reduce the frequency and the severity of exacerbations in the course of chronic illness. A patient may always have asthma as measured by spirometry. But if that asthma creates only minimal difficulties in his life, treatment can be said to be a true success. The family as well as the patient must learn to accept this treatment objective. In order to convince them of its importance to care, the practitioner must relinquish the myth of cure. He must try to accept even modest improvement in the illness experience as an acceptable outcome.