Humour and likability

Finally, care about what people have to say. I don't mean "appear to care" about what they have to say, I mean literally care. This is the hardest step in the process because sometimes we just don't care. It sounds callous, but it's true. Someone else's problems are just that …

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Dealing with stress

Do you absolutely have to share crude and tasteless humor and jokes on your newsfeed? Do you absolutely have to rant, rave, complain, and vent to your social media "friends"? Do you absolutely have put others down because of their political affiliations? Do you absolutely have to share your negative …

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When are these activities occurring?

Some people call it meditation and others might call it mindfulness. No matter what you call "finding inner calm," please don't overcomplicate it. You don't need a ten-thousand-dollar course to learn how to find some peace inside your head. Just sit down, be one with your thoughts, observe them, and …

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When do emotions cause problems?

Not only are depressed people plagued with self-doubts but their self-esteem plummets as well. Hold onto hope and accept that what you're going through will pass eventually. And finally, and most importantly, seek help immediately if you are feeling suicidal or have difficulty controlling thoughts of self-harm. Continue taking care …

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How to develop emotional intelligense

So, for psychotherapy to be a successful, you have to crave change, possess a curiosity of your inner world and an interest in understanding what motivates you, and tolerate a moderate degree of frustration. This is where the myth that only crazy people--or weak-minded individuals--go to therapy gets the boot …

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Repair your relationship house

They are after all working at the extreme. (Is it any wonder the military on long tours find it difficult?) Like being an astronaut on the International Space Station, there is always a way. A small plant is nature after all. Be creative. Look how creative your mind has been …

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Taking care of your body and mind

There is a definite goal. But there is no timetable. What you are doing is digging your way deeper and deeper through layers of illusion toward realization of the supreme truth of existence. The process itself is fascinating and fulfilling. It can be enjoyed for its own sake. There is …

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Creativity and follow through

You have no need to look down at others and feel "better" than them. You have no need to think certain people don't deserve to be treated the way you'd like to be treated. You have no need to EVER disrespect anyone - even if they're disrespecting you. It's the same …

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Freedom beats money

And if it's not interesting, don't put yourself down - tell a story that illustrates the diversity of your job. Every position can be described this way if you know how to go about it. Ask Educated Questions - Get in there and ask questions about the people you meet, but make …

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Say more without speaking

Of course, there are exceptions, but as Burton Malkiel notes, there is no scientific evidence to indicate that the performance of professionally managed portfolios, as a group, is any better than a randomly selected group of stocks.27 What about those few individuals who have attained considerable fame for predicting …

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Self-talk and self-fulfilling prophecies

They all turned out to be too high, no surprise given what I saw clinically. But his pulse was strong and regular. In a quiet single room surrounded by his family, he took several high doses of Librium and some fluids and began to settle down. I concluded that Tom …

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Setting a consequence

At that moment, I understood the reason behind the trials and tribulations I had endured in my past. I began to understand the divine reason for my life's journey: Its purpose was to make a difference in the world. Just knowing this valuable information closed those mental prison doors behind …

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What patterns are you noticing?

Instead, think about what you can do to overcome or prevent the things that are holding you back. Thinking about details is nothing more than doing your job. If you're a writer, your job is to write the best book you possibly can. If you're a designer, your job is …

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Being likable by not being unlikable

If location tracking is a priority, a GPS-enabled wristwatch like the GizmoWatch keeps track of kids through an app on parents' phones but only allows incoming and outgoing calls to and from select numbers. To investigate these expectations further, Chapman and Chapman gave undergraduate students thirty cards.8 Each card …

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Coping with low-intensity triggers

I believe that you have a special place in the order of life, a particular role to fill. And yes, it is one filled with vision, passion, and power. So hang on and get ready to get way more consciously into your own life. Don't feel selfish or egotistical because …

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Create a fake sun

What are the skills tied to self-compassion? One is the skill of tuning in to yourself, checking how you're feeling physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And then allowing that information to matter--because you matter. You worked on this in a fun way when we talked about challenging your shaming voice …

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Goal keeping and strength development

If a manuscript is rejected for publication, researchers think it's due to the arbitrary selection of a particularly critical reviewer, as opposed to the quality of what they wrote. You can use a watch to time your session, but don't peek at it every two minutes to see how you …

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How effectively do you allocate your time?

The study looked at 311 unmarried participants who were separated from their partners by distances ranging from ninety miles to more than 10,000 miles, for periods ranging from about two weeks to more than ten years. Those who used webcams and phone calls--methods most similar to face-to-face communication--were more …

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How to listen to other people

Sitting through restlessness is a little breakthrough in your meditation career. It will teach you a lot. You will find that agitation is actually rather a superficial mental state. It is inherently ephemeral. It comes and it goes. It has no real grip on you at all. By looking closely …

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Mental habitds of success

The more data points you have, the more reliable your observations will be. Engage and code your emotional state. Rinse and repeat. Take note of any observations. If a behavior repeatedly leads to HP or LP states, even for a few seconds or minutes, then you may intuitively decide that …

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Practice coping thoughts every day

And I also know that hardening my heart and approaching all relationships with skepticism and distrust is not in my nature, nor do I ever want to live that closed-off kind of life. Additionally, if I hadn't worked on tapping into my deep beauty and inner worth and, most importantly …

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What causes anxiety?

Request their direct telephone number as well. Now, sometimes you might not get the rep's last name or direct line, but it sets the stage with whomever you're speaking that you are a skilled consumer. To determine what other researchers are saying on this matter, a systematic review identified twelve …

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What people think about us

We can truly understand the meaning of the famous metaphor of the blind man who has a healthy body and the disabled person who has good eyes. Both of them, alone, are limited. But when the disabled person climbs on the shoulders of the blind man, together they can travel …

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Active listening

Do not get hung up in the estimate. When your mind is wild and agitated, you can often reestablish mindfulness with a few quick deep breaths. Pull the air in strongly and let it out the same way. This increases the sensation inside the nostrils and makes it easier to …

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Avoiding cliches

Increasing your activity level for one day is a great start, but the most powerful benefits will come from consistency. Once you get moving, how do you keep moving, day after day, week after week? Here are five ways to reap the long-term benefits of a more active lifestyle: Keep …

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Look for the positive

In fact, one procrastinator said he felt as if he were wearing a large "kick me" sign on his back. Let's imagine for a moment that you were a visitor from another planet who came down to Earth with orders to observe the behavior of Earthlings who habitually refuse to …

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Only 3% of us actually have our act together

It can be a touch, a sound, a sight, a taste, and a smell, in particular, is very powerful. What follows will illustrate some powerful examples through word and experience. Experience of my own. I sometimes relate this event on the speaking circuit, while reading it ensure your tongue is …

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What can i do about sleep problems?

You may spend kind money: think about where and for whom an additional ten pounds may bring most happiness. You may show healthy kindness: do a run for a good cause. Offer someone a night of freedom by helping them out with babysitting or by cooking meals they can put …

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Go with the flow

Great work so far! I hope you congratulate yourself for already beginning. In fact, doing something nice for yourself as a thank-you is healthy self-compassion and self-care. You may be asking yourself, If that's the case, then why have I not done this reformulation of self before? I always say …

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I don't have the energy or the commitment

Life not only feels better but actually goes better, and I function better, when I'm achieving my goals than when I'm not. Knowing our goals helps us be organized, and we need to ask ourselves if the things we're doing are leading us towards our goals. One way to help …

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Who is most likely to develop depression?

If you are using your coping strategies your anxiety is likely to abate and once it has reduced to, say, a three, you can choose something a little more difficult from the list you have drawn up. Michelle practised this exercise for two days, three times a day until her …

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