Render Tender Points Painless

You have permission to grieve your old life, for as long as you like. Bob Marley's quote, `One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain', was so true. Joe came out of his reverie only when the singing stopped. But if ya need one, call …

more ...

The Power of Pleasing Pressure

If you find yourself feeling especially triggered or experiencing true emotional distress as a result of your memories, it could be helpful for you to work with a therapist. She expressed feelings of utter helplessness and the conviction that she would never be able to handle what came her way …

more ...

Be ahead of all parting

Numerous brain networks became activated, with variation in activity areas between individuals, presumably based on their specific memory, associations and emotional response. But the area that lit up, over and over again, was the reward system. It was pleasurable for the nuns to recall these spiritual encounters. There have since …

more ...

Reading (or Listening to) a Great Article

Seeking inclusion in a defined parenting group such as these isn't necessary and sometimes leads to feelings of inferiority or superiority, but generally parents who find a parenting group or groups that are a good fit, either online or in person, see them as invaluable for their mental health. I …

more ...

Take Them Off the Pedastal

On a deep neurological level, our brains are invested in maintaining rather than changing our beliefs. The extra effort it would require consciously to change our minds about something, to lay down new neural tracts for this new conflicting thought, might simply not be worthwhile. This is especially true of …

more ...

What if the boundaries I set hurt the other person?

Some people feel like they are putting themselves under a microscope or like the spotlight is suddenly on them, and that can feel emotionally overwhelming. Taking your time and focusing on this being a marathon experience, rather than a sprint, is a great way to prepare yourself for what lies …

more ...

Elbow Your Pain Out of the Way

Exclusively nursed babies have fewer allergic rashes, intestinal disorders, and risk of NEC while they are being exclusively nursed, and parents who nurse do have a lower risk of breast cancer. It does have some very specific benefits, but you can let go of your worry that if you give …

more ...



Practicing Stoicism Everyday

Our beliefs are formed by, and simultaneously sum up, our unique sense of reality, and since this dictates how we interact with the world, the effect is a constant reinforcing of the beliefs that we acquired early in our lives. Long before we have an opinion about politics or football …

more ...

Try Too Hard

The Anger De-escalation Two-Step take one step back put on your oxygen mask (slow down, take a breath, and ground) make an empathy statement take another step back and . state what you observed without shaming or threatening state what you want them to do (for repair and to save face …

more ...

Understanding The Concept Of Allowing

At times, it feels validating, because it gives us a language to talk about what's happening in the subtext of our parenting lives, and it can feel good to know that your personal story is part of a larger collective one. Other times, it feels overwhelming and hopeless. My intention …

more ...

Who Gets It?

Signals are sent to the survival brain to mobilize for self-protection. Simultaneously, signals are sent to the frontal lobes to engage socially through facial expression or words if the novelty turns out to be nonthreatening--or even friendly. Functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) brain scans show that for an individual suffering …

more ...

Developing Healthy Boundaries

Go out of your way to create a sensory experience if you need to so that you can complete the process all the way to the end. As you do, mentally describe the sensory experience you are having. For example, say to yourself I see a yellow bus, I smell …

more ...

Have a big mind perspective

The pathway to building a loving and trusting relationship with your body is similar to a mental health journey; But following a diet will never lead to long-term body love and acceptance. If you're on board with the anti-diet movement but are struggling to accept the size of your body …

more ...

Rub a Dub Dub

Emotionally and mentally, a strong EQ means that you will experience a greater level of self-confidence and self-esteem, you will value yourself more, and you will stand up for yourself more. People with a strong EQ tend to find themselves thriving in social settings because they have compassion and grace …

more ...

The Situation and the Story

Created in 2000 by Jakob Lund in Denmark to rehabilitate violent gang members, the BreatheSMART protocol increases sensation awareness that opens up shut-down emotional channels. The group intentionally slows their breathing so that the exhale is long and controlled by each participant giving full and undivided attention. This method, which …

more ...

The Zero-Point Position

I let each child have a turn to feel their sensations while sitting on the ball and then return to their seats to continue coloring. Much to my surprise, not one child asked for help because they didn't understand the assignment or couldn't find their sensations. I wish that I …

more ...

Use Your Strengths

For all its roots in the fallible business of perception, our species' ability to construct the most exquisitely florid and fiendish systems of belief is truly awe-inspiring. The Believing Brain What do you believe in? Manchester United FC? Innate human decency? Our beliefs are as varied as we are. They …

more ...

When You Have a Bad Day

When a parent is in the depths of nursing challenges, it's hard to predict whether they'll want to be encouraged to keep going or nudged to change course. But what is consistent is that the negative feelings or critical self-beliefs that emerge from this process can remain for years -- sometimes …

more ...

Can you hear the early-warning signal?

Midwife Brittany-Lyne Carriere says, I don't regularly weigh my pregnant clients because I know it can be triggering. It also does not offer me a lot of insight to their wellbeing. Weight isn't a good indicator of a healthy pregnancy. I rather discuss their relationship with food and movement if …

more ...

Can you help like a true champ?

Mentally, your happiness will translate into positive and enjoyable thoughts that make the entire experience of happiness feel truly enjoyable and even addicting. The Psychological and Physiological Experience of Love The emotional experience of love produces the two neurochemicals known as dopamine and oxytocin. When you fall in love with …

more ...

Changing Reality - the Magnet

The nuclear family is itself under extreme stress, as indicated by high divorce rates. This void is filled by the peer group . Kids were never meant to nurture one another or to be role models for one another, Dr Neufeld says. They are not up to the task. It's the …

more ...

Push Me, Pull You

Psychiatric diagnosis is not that simple! Analysis of the brains of people diagnosed with schizophrenia has demonstrated that they have fewer connections in the circuits involved in learning, memory, reasoning, flexibility and higher cognitive control (the hippocampus and orbital prefrontal cortex). These areas also have a slower speed of electrical …

more ...


When Size Does Matter

The prefrontal cortex is the evolved part of your brain that is believed to house your logic, ration, reason, and conscious thinking, and it is an essential part of your brain when it comes to engaging in humanity. You need to be able to rely on it and use it …

more ...

Anxiety Secrets Revealed

Paleo and CrossFit. Low fat and running. My weight has gone up and down so many times I've lost count, as I've cycled through gaining and losing the same pounds over and over again. Like many children of the eighties, I was born into a family that modelled a fear …

more ...

Back Off the Gas

After a few turns if the child is still unaware of certain parts of the body--for example, doesn't involve their shoulders and arms--the teacher can suggest exploring what it might feel like to engage the upper limbs. Usually, this step is not necessary unless the reflexes are exceptionally inert. As …

more ...

How To Succeed When Nobody Else Will

And perception is just one of virtually countless tasks it's tackling simultaneously. To generate a working version of reality it has to transduce incoming signals from our ears, eyes, nose and other sensory organs to charged sodium and potassium ions, and pump them in and out of nerve cells. It …

more ...

I choose to accept the way I am

For example, let's say you got in an argument with your spouse and something they said triggered an emotional hijacking within you, associated with the emotion of anger. If you were to think about what they said at a later time, you might feel that emotional hijacking all over again …

more ...

Invest the time

It does this by governing unconscious bodily processes such as your heartbeat, the creation of your hormones and energy levels. Your subconscious mind also continually scans the world around you based on the input of your five senses, and uses this information to determine what is needed in order to …

more ...

Making Small Groups Work

When a child has suffered trauma, the feelings can, at times, be unbearable. Sometimes, nature takes over by numbing access to the emotions through the dorsal branch of the vagus nerve (blue zone) causing dissociation. A child who goes into a blind rage and threatens or hurts another, for example …

more ...

The Ninja Guide To How To Succeed Better

There are other reasons that sexual play may be limited during the postpartum period. The most obvious is that if a parent has given birth, their genitals are off limits for a few weeks to a few months while they recover (whether they gave birth surgically or vaginally). If there …

more ...

The Oriental View

The Perceiving Brain Our brain brings a predetermined package of capabilities and responses to every situation. It directs our interaction with our environment and is in turn moulded, through the formation of new neural pathways, by the thoughts and emotions that occur as a result of these interactions. In the …

more ...

How Hard Do You Push?

This suggests that all relationships are to some extent reliant on deep-brain functioning to do with pleasure, reward and motivation. I spoke with Robin Dunbar, professor of evolutionary psychology at Oxford University, who has spent his career researching the social brain. Robin has explored how - and, crucially, why - human beings …

more ...

How Not To Succeed

Feelings are driven by your conscious thoughts, and by the conscious reflections, you have in regards to the emotions you are experiencing. You can have emotions without having feelings. However, you cannot have feelings without having emotions. As well, the way certain emotions feel to you can be shifted over …

more ...

How to not bring your awful day home with you

Because so much of household and parent work is culturally invisible, it's critical that each parent recognize it as work and appreciate how they and their children benefit from the work that their partner does. Don't assume your partner knows you are thankful for all that they do -- find ways …

more ...

Take the trip

I prefer the Belgau Balance Board because it is easy to adjust the angle on the underside of the board to allow for a gentle, progressive challenge. And because there are so many gradations it can be used with kindergarten through high school age. Exercises to Improve Balance Reflexes Start …

more ...

The Role of Music

There will be inconveniences in life, and you will be setting yourself up for a very difficult life if there is never anybody you can call to help you out. If we do not talk about an issue, it will continue to fester inside of us and influence what we …

more ...

What Is Manipulation

This broad preference for sameness among friends contrasts with the criteria we employ when looking for reproductive partners. The strong innate drive to produce offspring with a robust immune system has been vindicated by recent research into the crucial part an individual's immune system plays in their health outcomes. The …

more ...