Speaking Engagements

Or shall I say, how scarring what one learns to define as love can be. When I was throwing my articles on my bed, and dashing to Vinny's house a few blocks away because he was timing me to see how quickly I could get there after school, I believed …

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Kitchen (and Laundry) Duty

The man stared coldly toward the stage as an audience runner made his way to him with a microphone. Social media gives us a gateway to hate and division, but it also provides access to people, just like you and me, who are banging the drum, marching to their own …

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The courage to love and to create

I supposed maybe my mother wasn't so wrong for not showing me the validation I craved so much. I couldn't fit in, not even with kids who had never met me before. The disease of invisibility was beginning to take me over. My father was the one who told us …

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From voicing your needs?

This is bonkers, she said finally, looking up. I think you can do it, I replied. When we're driving in the car and the questions are competing with tunes on the radio, and we can't think for the sound around us, we can offer an option: Music or questions? Perhaps …

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You're old enough to handle this on your?

You're not good at this, and you struggle with that, you're never going to be able to . Those things don't happen for people like us. I didn't know what felt worse, not knowing why I got beaten up, the pain from being beaten up, the humiliation of being beaten up …

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Finding My Brave Self

With regard to meditation and religions or attitudes towards life, which have meditation as their core element, one often hears the saying that the path is the goal. In doing so, you are already fulfilling the purpose of meditation by practicing it. I could feel some breathing room open up …

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Being in the moment is healing

Your focus is on feeling the air rush through your nose as you breath. This feeling represents your meditation object in the context of this meditation exercise. This is only a half-truth. Acceptance or rejection isn't just a matter of what you can provide, but also a matter of what …

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I overeat fried food

Please, read article 6 again to get a thorough reminder of this. It Sounds Too Intense and Anal. Just go ahead and read article 5 again, and you'll be reminded that the people who truly make things happen sound too intense. They sound like the anal, detail-oriented kid that makes …

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On Trusting the Process

Avoid food triggers that create a leaky gut. A strong gut makes a strong body. Move toward an unprocessed whole-food, plant-based diet. Heal Thy Gut The role of elimination CASE 1: Jane S is a 62-year-old female who arrived at the office with shortness of breath during exertion. She was …

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The courage to get through the day

Rather than making me become semiconscious, as listening to music does, it actually heightens my awareness and engagement with the task at hand. Anytime you can use technology to improve your connection to yourself and your surroundings, do it. The Equipment Compromise The equipment we rely on every time we …

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Sleepless Sleepovers

Jot down any and all words, images, and ideas that come to mind. For some people, your thoughts may immediately go to an experience of trauma. That's not unusual. Make a choice about how to take care of yourself. If you can, use this as an opportunity to explore it …

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I do not stop eating when I am full

In fact, you could even make this a golden rule for yourself, and, if you're feeling empowered, you can ask those you're with to do the same. You can back up your request with the knowledge you've gained by reading this article. For instance, we now know the importance of …

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Open-Ended versus Closed-Ended Questions

But then on day three I noticed a real change in him. He started becoming more confident and peaceful. I bumped into him a few months after the trip and asked him how he was doing. He told me, There's not a day that goes by when I don't think …

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I have no discipline

If learning which variation of this exercise better activates your glutes gets you back on the basketball court five days earlier than expected, then perhaps you should keep using the shorts. If not, then it'd be better for you to set this $700 item aside and instead defer to the …

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Do you feel that you trust your intuition enough?

On the other hand, a systems approach to increased exercise proves much more valuable. To see what that might look like, try the reflection exercise that follows. You can do it as a solo writing exercise, but it's best if you do this with a partner or a group so …

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We start at the bottom and climb up

Certain results then follow in the development of the ordinary child. One result is a denial in awareness of the satisfactions that were experienced. The other is to distort the symbolization of the experience of the parents. The accurate symbolization would be: I perceive my parents as experiencing this behavior …

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What Is Freedom?

These untested perceptions are also a part of our personal reality, and may have as much authority as those which have been checked. That the perceptual field is the reality to which the individual reacts is often strikingly illustrated in therapy, where it is frequently evident that when the perception …

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What's fair is fair

The task had much reality for these personal counselors, since the problem presented by the client was a vocational one, with many emotional concomitants and indications of personal maladjustment. The client material was always the same with only those minimal adjustments following the counselor's responses which might be necessary to …

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Love is supposed to be unconditional

These studies, as well as our experiences, have led us to expect that standards, values, and decisions arrived at by group members themselves will be accepted to a greater degree by the group members than those that are not arrived at in this way. Lewin and Grabbe have stated this …

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Love is actually my life purpose

Assuming they had reached Asia, they referred to the inhabitants they encountered as Indians. I chose to use Native Americans as it appears to be the term most commonly accepted among Indigenous people, though I recognize that it is not uniformly accepted. Jim Crow laws were laws that enforced racial …

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Waves of conceptualization

A group will distrust a leader whom they feel is subtly manipulating them to reach his goals. There is also good reason for the leader to be sensitive to resistance to his planning and to be willing to discard his plans should the group decide to reject them. Getting Members …

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Afraid of the financial implications of getting a divorce

Like negative emotions, positive emotions each come with telltale physical signs to help you recognize them. When we experience negative emotions, it's easy to feel the full impact on our bodies, minds, and behaviors. We can identify the familiar weight of sadness bearing down or the tears stinging the back …

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Lack of Vision

For example, maybe you lack the energy to clean your house or go grocery shopping, but that doesn't mean you're lazy. Few people are. More likely, if you consider yourself lazy, you just don't have energy reserves to draw on because you're so busy surviving, or you've devoted all your …

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Discipline Over Motivation

Which path you choose depends on the usefulness of the iceberg. EMBRACE THE ICEBERG (WHILE SHAVING OFF THE TROUBLE SPOTS) Some icebergs reflect what we like about ourselves and want to keep, like I should always be there for the people I love. Those core values are worth keeping. It …

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What are we missing?

If someone turns you down for a social event, you leap to the interpretation that they don't like you, not even considering that they may have had previous plans. You may be easily triggered, reacting in ways that seem inappropriate or out of proportion. You may get lost in ruminations …

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Love is actually special

Together, the first two barriers (not belonging in our own bodies or in the world) undermine our abilities to belong to each other--in partnerships, families, groups, and communities. I experienced this, intimately, in my own family. I vividly remember the day my mother bought my bat mitzvah dress. I awoke …

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Come into My Office

You can instantaneously cut off the sympathetic nervous system by shifting your mind from threat to treat. That doesn't mean, of course, that escapism is a long-term fix. If you're facing a crisis in your job and spend the entire day dreaming about a vacation on the beach, that isn't …

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Body connection

What makes one person bounce back from adversity and another crumble? The answer to that is thinking styles. One of the most important ingredients in resilience is controlling your emotions and behaviors, and that means controlling your thoughts. As we shall see, how we think has a profound influence on …

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The Spiritual Purpose of Empaths

But that's beside the point. Am I jealous? I don't think so. If it was jealousy, there'd be some feeling of anger or hate, but there isn't. As I read these stories they seemed to have one thing in common. They all had a sense of patience. For example, I …

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The short answer is no

They assist in setting up a vibrational energy field around you; Most important, they remind you of who you are, your truest self. Affirmations are something you work with. They also work on and with you, your thoughts, emotions, and consciousness. This basic rest pose is a simple restorative pose …

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College Counseling

That is okay. Take a couple of deep breaths and realize that there is another simple way to separate out the information. You can write out each category on separate sheets of paper. Colored paper works just fine if you already have it close by. Remember to Breathe Breath is …

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Afraid of overspending

In fact, they add to the murkiness that hides below the surface of this game. The game begins when someone is financially wronged (or thinks she has been), and believes she can do nothing to set things right. She begins to tell other people about the financial injury and the …

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