This happens to everybody. And there is a simple solution. Put most of your effort into one-pointedness at the beginning. Just keep calling the attention from wandering over and over again. Tough it out. Full instructions on how to do this are in chapters 7 and 8. A couple of …

Because so many drugs can contribute to depression, if you are experiencing symptoms of depression, have a health care professional assess the medications you are taking to see if any might be adding to your struggle. Ask if dosages of suspect drugs can be adjusted, eliminated, or replaced with a …

There will be times when we feel stress. When we struggle and struggle with a prob - that solves it for us, the next thing we do is to stop using that approach. This happens to me. I come up with a good strategy for something and the next thing I …

It's as though you and your thoughts have melded together and become one. For example: think to yourself I am an orange.' When you did this you may have then thoughtI'm an orange ... er ... right ... OK then ...' It's a thought you had, but you didn't automatically believe it. (Did …

By forgiving, you are accepting what happened and finding a way to live in a state of resolution with it. It may happen quite quickly or it may be a gradual process. You might find it helpful to write an honest, emotional letter telling the other person how hurt and …

Anytime I'm on an airliner, I want my pilot looking at the current situation and making a real-time, informed decision, not picking his course of action on what happened one, two, or five years ago. Bottom line: Whatever the situation in which you find yourself, the appropriate questions are, "Can …

Going to bed and getting up late, not flossing your teeth, not picking up after yourself, playing on your phone, not staying focused, choosing fun over work, spending money on little things you don't need, and choosing to get upset and worried instead of remaining calm are little things adding …

Prices are constant, so a cup of coffee will cost the same in either world. What about you? In which of these worlds would you choose to live? Usually, over 50 per cent of the audience would prefer to live in the first world. This is consistent with academic studies …

As I've suggested, the latest research shows us that what's going on in your gut influences what goes on in your brain--not the other way around. So, if the evidence shows us that the brain is responding to messages sent by the gut, primarily through the vagus nerve, then it …

You're known as a leader. You push yourself to do well. You thrive on projects that need control, order, and predictability. Healthy intimate relationships generally require flexibility, openness, and spontaneity. True connection requires vulnerability. You need to control what others know about you--and that gets in the way of emotional …

Kill the mental chatter the second it starts. Stop the self-pity and self-doubt conversations. Stop the inner-negativity. It's a bad habit. Tell the mental chatter, as Jocko Willink puts it, "I'm busy. Come back later when I'm not!" Stop worrying about what the voices are saying. Stop listening to them …

"The results suggested that suppressing the thought for the first five minutes caused it to `rebound' even more prominently into the participants' minds later," according to an article in Monitor on Psychology. Wegner later dubbed this tendency "ironic process theory" to explain why it's so difficult to tame intruding thoughts …

Thomas Edison's productivity was boosted by napping. Napoleon Bonaparte would nap anywhere he could because he was so busy he didn't know when the next opportunity to rest would present itself. Leonardo Da Vinci took a 15-minute naps every 4 hours and slept less at night. On top of 10 …

It directly influences the content and quality of every moment that you live. We needn't consider ourselves to be religious in order to invite prayer into our lives. In my eyes, prayers of love, gratitude and care are powerful, healing energetic frequencies that do count, and do make a real …

Another subtle culprit: margarine. Stick to real butter, as margarine is high in unhealthy trans-fatty acids, along with coloring additives and emulsifiers. Refined sugars. Avoid foods high in refined sugar, like cookies, most juices, and of course candy. The trouble is they have a detrimental effect on your blood sugar …

There are several things you can do to manage the unhelpful impact that a fear of failure can have. The main problem with a fear of failure is that it tends to operate on an unconscious level. Think back to when you've had an opportunity to achieve something - to learn …

It's focusing on what you're giving to that person (which instantly brings you happiness as well as bringing the other person happiness) and allows the relationship to prosper. However, most people don't do this. They focus on what they're getting instead. Take my good friend Sarah and her husband Tom …

What's more, martial arts teach self-control, and progressing within the discipline makes you more able to defend yourself, which can provide a confidence boost. There are many types of martial art to choose from, whether it's a 'softer' style, such as aikido, or something 'harder' like taekwondo. Each has its …

As we have already seen, if someone tries to persuade you that you are a thief, they can't get to you, because factually, you know you're not a thief. By contrast, if they challenge something more abstract and subjective--your intelligence, your likeability, your sensitivity, worth, talent, or character--your ears perk …

Let it go - be someone interesting, new and exciting. Only then can you build the rapport that will generate likability. We'll work on this a LOT in the coming chapters, so don't feel like it's something you should just know off the bat. Finally, the third thing that natural likability …

And even if the initial data is relevant, we often pay too much attention to that data, and thereby fail to make sufficient adjustments when new information becomes available. Anchoring can affect judgments in many aspects of our personal and professional lives. The prices that we negotiate in our financial …

A value rule is part of the moral code by which you live your life, whereas an outcome is more about what you have done. There are some people who believe they are guilty simply because they are alive. Someone who feels guilty but cannot tell you why may be …

When the brain receives pain signals, it will often try to protect the body by telling the area of the brain that controls movement to hold the muscles tight or stop the movement. Avoiding movements that hurt makes sense in the short term; it is good for injuries like a …

This sense of isolation makes depressed people feel as if an invisible wall is preventing them from experiencing any kind of relief. And this wall often seems impossible to overcome. Not only do people who are depressed have difficulty describing what they are feeling to others but it can also …

Discernment is a third component of a present-moment orientation. It may be viewed as the capacity to hold all experience with kindness and compassion, supporting skillful choice around how we respond even though we may be experiencing reactivity. This is cultivated within mindfulness meditation practice, which is then generalized to …

Start small Do the smallest step that will get you started. For example: if you need to answer a difficult email, the first step would be to turn on the computer. Work it into your routine Tie a new, unpleasant task into your routine by adding it on to something …

Then, if some pain lingers, use it as an object of meditation. The first step is physical handling. Maybe the pain is an illness of one sort or another, a headache, fever, bruises, or whatever. In this case, employ standard medical treatments before you sit down to meditate: take your …

The belief was that if we don't take justice into our own hands, no one else will act on our behalf, leaving the door open for more trespasses of our boundaries. And yet, ask yourself, Which is a bigger sign of weakness: letting the offensive actions of someone else determine …

Of these, belief in a higher power is the most important. Faith can come in many forms. For me, it has always been trust in God. For someone else, it might be faith in a parent, a teacher, a friend, or something beyond himself. Honestly, I think that if you …

Please go check out one of these and begin practicing. You'll gain confidence in your ability to work with your mind in this way. Practice will help you get better--but perfection isn't achievable. We'll use this practice of mindfulness throughout the following chapters. In the next chapter, we'll talk about …