Be aware of your thoughts, feelings and responses

This step requires asking the question, "What experiences have I had to support the healthier and more productive view I discerned in Step Five?" After all the feelings are sorted out comes the moment when the truth is told. Admitting that your feelings are yours, owning them as your reality …

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Learn what you can

The picking on each other started and continued. "If she could drop just a few pounds." "That laugh is so shrill." "Those socks are too short," and "I can't stand the way he drives." "He watches way too much TV." "She is so uptight about money," your parents might have …

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Giving and receiving praise

I texted my friend and didn't get a response! How could I NOT feel anxious and upset?" The problem is that this statement assumes that everyone would feel the exact same way about this event as you do. Although many people feel anxious when a friend doesn't text them back …

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Asking someone to change their behaviour

But if you take the time to calm your body down, turn off your fear-based reactive brain, and turn on your thinking brain, you will be in a much better place to respond to the specific event that triggered your anxiety. The key is "think small." In fact, the smaller …

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Rushed and pressured

Still, when I'm getting ready to file something, or to put it on the pile on my desk, and I hear myself saying, "Oh, I'll need to get to this later," I stop and ask myself, "Could I possibly take care of this now?" Adjust this to your audience. For …

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Dealing with stress

Giving up a long held belief or lifestyle, even one that works against you, isn't easy. Beating up on yourself doesn't help, nor does trying to hurry the process along. Like a cigarette smoker who only wants to stop smoking--but never gives stopping an honest try, wishing alone doesn't help …

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Incorporating meditation into self-care

When his wife took his car keys so he couldn't drive to his drug dealer twelve miles away, he got on his ten-speed bicycle and pedaled, on the highway, to get his fix. When he went to play basketball abroad--no longer US material--first in Italy, then China, Turkey, even Iran …

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What's got you riled up?

This is a device for gaining concentration. There are numerous ways of counting. Any counting should be done mentally. Do not make any sound when you count. Following are some of the ways of counting. While breathing in, count "one, one, one, one..." until the lungs are full of fresh …

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How to act when you are under pressure

May their words be pleasing to others. May they be free from fear, tension, anxiety, worry, and restlessness. Magnesium is the fourth most abundant mineral in the human body, yet it is readily depleted in the face of chronic stress. If you're low on magnesium anyway, stressful times can cause …

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Stop seeking likes

But you don't have to go the whole way to reap benefits. The benefits start right away, and they pile up over the years. It is a cumulative function: the more you sit, the more you learn about the real nature of your own existence. The more hours you spend …

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What people really expect of you

It means that you regulate your daily routine and make efforts to improve current relationships. Effective management also includes attending to self-care, following a healthy lifestyle and diet, getting physical exercise, and following the treatment plan you developed with your provider. Self-management is best done in collaboration with your health …

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What's funny?

When beginning the process of taming the bramble of old and thorny emotions in yourself, talk therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can provide exactly the tools you need to succeed. At The Center, we use a variation of CBT called dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT), which is a clear and …

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Keep it personal

"Whew. You seem really normal! I promise you I am too. Plus, you know, the first two minutes of a date are the scariest, and we've gotten through that, so let's see what else we can get through." Then, smile. Congratulations! You've just put your date at ease, and communicated …

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Consider the ideal affect

I adjust, accommodate, or avoid things in my life to minimize the trauma of triggers and encourage you to do the same. Through trial and error and self-observation you'll learn what experiences are triggers for you. Make them known to yourself, and make them known aloud to others. Insist that …

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When are these activities occurring?

Some people call it meditation and others might call it mindfulness. No matter what you call "finding inner calm," please don't overcomplicate it. You don't need a ten-thousand-dollar course to learn how to find some peace inside your head. Just sit down, be one with your thoughts, observe them, and …

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I might not do it right

In this way, attention is drawn to investigating the present moment and not to the narrative of past experiences or predictions for the future. Compassion is an essential component in meeting the moments of self-judgment, which helps disrupt the negative view of self that perpetuates depression. The compassionate teacher conveys …

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Ways of improving optimism

Anemia (iron-poor blood) can fatigue and make a person feel listless. Hypothyroidism (hormone imbalance) can flatten or even agitate mood. Mood changes may also occur from the psychological stress of coping with a medical condition or may be caused by the illness itself or by the medications used to treat …

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Finding people who want to talk to you

Every mental state has a birth, a growth, and a decay. You should strive to see these stages clearly. This is no easy thing to do, however. As we have already noted, every thought and sensation begins first in the unconscious region of the mind and only later rises to …

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Chance rapport

Confession compels us to acknowledge who we are and to continually seek to improve. What's more, confession puts us in the position to receive God's peace, comfort, and forgiveness. Confess has its origin in "agreement." So beyond the relief from worrying that we might be found out, confession means agreeing …

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Positive thinking and positive action

Twelve-step programs are typified by AA, NA, and related groups for families and teenagers. They are offered for a variety of specific drugs, including alcohol, opioids, cocaine, nicotine, and marijuana, and for behavioral addictions such as gambling, sex, and food. Those who work the program are expected to progress through …

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When someone asks you for something

Don't sit there looking for things to be mindful of. Keep your mindfulness on the breath until something else steps in and pulls your attention away. When you feel that happening, don't fight it. Let your attention flow naturally over to the distraction, and keep it there until the distraction …

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Why giving back to others is essential

How can people manage the complex challenges of addiction if they have blood sugars bouncing around from uncontrolled diabetes, or chest pain from walking up a flight of stairs, or difficulty breathing, or knees or hips burning up with the inflammation and pain of arthritis? Of course, these questions answer …

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Treatment should be recovery oriented

Instead of being imprisoned by all of the rules and boundaries - you're becoming free. You're no longer being imprisoned by your immaturity, bad decisions, and bad habits. You're breaking the shackles and chains you put on yourself. You're opening the door and walking out of the prison you've chosen to …

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Finding shortcuts

They took my pain and made it their pain! They asked, Why are you doing this to yourself? and Being self-employed isn't worth going through this much trouble and completely ruining your life and credit. We could say that when I went against my own advice, by not taking care …

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What can i do about my pain?

Deaths from overdoses from opioid prescription medications have far exceeded those from heroin for over fifteen years, though heroin overdoses have escalated considerably in recent years. As previously noted, by 2013, opioid sales and dependence had exceeded dependence on either alcohol, cocaine, and marijuana, and deaths from opioids now exceed …

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Putting it all to good use

It taps you into a whole new dimension of sensation, and you feel like a blind man whose sight has been restored. Every action you perform is made up of separate components. The simple action of tying your shoelaces is made up of a complex series of subtle motions. Most …

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